Sex-positive psychotherapist Kate Loree discusses managing mental health within polyamory and consensual non-monogamy, highlighting how mood and personality disorders can impact relationships. The conversation explores the complexities of navigating emotions, clear communication, boundaries, and compassion in non-monogamous dynamics. Strategies for handling depressive episodes, manic states, and understanding behaviors related to conditions like ADHD and chronic fatigue are also discussed.
Mood and personality disorders impact non-monogamous relationships, necessitating structured communication and understanding individual mental health needs.
Anxiety in non-monogamous settings requires clear boundaries, scheduled support, and respect for coping mechanisms to foster healthy relationships.
Depression and mania complexities in polyamorous relationships call for open communication, support systems, and collaborative mental health management.
Deep dives
Managing Mental Health in Non-Monogamous Relationships
Mood and personality disorders, such as anxiety, depression, BPD, and NPD, can significantly impact consensually non-monogamous relationships, highlighting the complexity when combining mental health challenges with non-monogamy. Situational statistics reveal that mental illnesses affect 1 in 5 American adults, intensifying in non-monogamous dynamics due to unresolved attachment issues and increased involvement of multiple partners. Implementing clear communication, setting structured agreements, and understanding individual mental health needs are seen as crucial strategies in navigating mental health within non-monogamous relationships.
Challenges in Supporting Partners with Anxiety
Individuals with anxiety in non-monogamous settings can experience heightened fears and panic attacks, necessitating structured schedules, clear relationship boundaries, and well-defined expectations for mitigating anxiety levels. Partners of anxious individuals may feel controlled due to excessive monitoring, leading to a need for self-awareness on managing anxieties and respecting varying coping mechanisms. Addressing anxiety symptoms collaboratively and considering partners' emotional needs are vital for fostering healthy relationships amid anxiety-related challenges.
Navigating Depression and Mania in Polyamorous Relationships
Depression and mania's interplay can introduce complexities in non-monogamous relationships, with depressed partners requiring extended support systems and careful management to prevent isolation and promote balance. Partners may face challenges with managing impulsive behaviors during manic episodes, impacting relationship agreements and emotional well-being. Open communication, self-care practices, and addressing mental health issues collaboratively are essential for maintaining healthy dynamics in polyamorous relationships amidst mental health fluctuations.
Dealing with Traits of ADHD and Compulsiveness in Non-Monogamous Relationships
ADHD individuals in non-monogamous relationships may struggle with compulsive behaviors due to their scattered thought patterns. Partners may warn them about past hurts, but the ADHD brain may struggle to retain this info, leading to unintentional hurtful actions. Proper treatment and medication can enhance empathy and judgment in manic individuals, fostering better relationships within non-monogamy.
Navigating Borderline Personality Disorder in Non-Monogamous Relationships
Individuals with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) may idealize partners initially but may later fear abandonment, leading to intense emotional shifts. In non-monogamous settings, having multiple partners can act as a safety net against abandonment fears and support persons with BPD. Insight, assertiveness, and self-love play crucial roles in managing the complexities of relationships with individuals having BPD traits.
Sex-positive psychotherapist, Kate Loree joins us to talk about managing mental health within polyamory and consensual non-monogamy -- specifically how mood and personality disorders like anxiety, depression, BPD, NPD, etc., can impact these relationships. According to NAMI one in five American adults experienced mental illness in 2020. When we combine this with consensual non-monogamy (CNM), things can become even more complex. As Kate points out, CNM tends to poke at unresolved attachment injuries more than is typical in monogamous relationships plus polyamory involves more people which means there’s more to navigate. While this conversation is geared toward non-monogamous relationships, the strategies Kate discusses can be adapted to various relationship styles, including kink dynamics and monogamous relationships.
In addition to her master’s in marriage and family therapy, she also has an MBA and is a registered art therapist (ATR). She is an EDSE-certified sex educator and an EMDR-certified therapist with additional training in the Trauma Resiliency Model (TRM) for the treatment of trauma. She has been practicing psychotherapy since 2003.
Kate is the author of Open Deeply: A Guide to Building Conscious, Compassionate Open Relationships (release date 4/19/22) and cohosts the sex-positive podcast of the same name, Open Deeply, with Sunny Megatron. She’s been featured in Buzzfeed videos and has guested on Playboy Radio and many podcasts, including American Sex, Sluts and Scholars, and Sex Nerd Sandra. She’s written for Good Vibrations, Hollywood Magazine, and is a frequent public speaker.