EP 525: Honesty Is the First Form of Intimacy with Vanessa

In this candid and grounded coaching session, Christine works with Vanessa, who is navigating a season of major transition—emotionally, physically, and relationally. After a recent car accident, a job layoff, and re-entering the dating world, Vanessa finds herself at a powerful crossroads: learning how to speak honestly about concerns early in a relationship instead of withholding to protect someone else's feelings.

Christine helps Vanessa see how "withholding" is often disguised as kindness, but actually blocks true intimacy. Together, they explore how unspoken concerns—especially around health, sleep, and long-term compatibility—can quietly erode connection if left unaddressed. The session becomes a masterclass in how to practice radical honesty with love, maturity, and self-responsibility.

If you struggle to speak up in relationships, fear hurting others by being honest, or notice yourself over-adapting to keep the peace, this episode will help you understand why truth is not only necessary—but essential—for real intimacy.

Consider / Ask Yourself:

• Do you hold back concerns in relationships to avoid conflict or discomfort?
• Are you afraid that honesty might sabotage connection or intimacy?
• Do you notice yourself adapting or minimizing your needs early in relationships?
• Where might you be confusing caretaking with love?
• Are you dating (or partnering) with clear intention—or avoiding difficult conversations?

Key Insights and A-HAs:

• Withholding information is not kindness—it creates emotional distance.
• Honesty early in relationships prevents deeper confusion later.
• Boundaries are not about changing others; they're about honoring yourself.
• Emotional intimacy requires courage, not perfection.
• Speaking truth with love strengthens connection rather than destroying it.

How to Deepen the Work:

• Notice where you feel a "withhold" in your body—tightness, anxiety, or avoidance.
• Practice sharing concerns from a grounded, non-blaming place.
• Reframe honesty as an act of love rather than a risk.
• Ask yourself: If I don't say this now, how will it affect me later?
• Focus on breaking patterns of over-adapting or people-pleasing in relationships.

Coaching with Christine

Christine has been coaching individuals for over 20 years and works with a small number of private clients at a time to provide deep, personalized support.

If you feel called to explore coaching, email jill@christinehassler.com for more information.

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