This week, Elle, Vee and repeat guest Athena spill all the messy, hilarious, and downright disastrous sex stories you never hear about. From sneezing out cum and fishing out lost condoms to broken furniture, tampon mishaps, and anal surprises, nothing is off-limits. We share our own awkward moments along with wild tales from the community that prove sex fails are equal parts mortifying and funny. Because at the end of the day, sex is messy, bodies are human, and sometimes the best aftercare is just laughing it off.

Cum In Your Nose, Snorting and Sneezing Cum. (00:00)

Where Do Your Play Partners Cum Most Often? (4:42)

Condoms Stuck Inside the Pussy & Condom Clean Up Etiquette. (6:12)

Stuck Tampons. (12:38)

IUD Pokes and Issues (17:01)

Anal “Oopsies”. (20:41)

Furniture Fails. (29:54)

Throwing Up While Sucking Dick. (35:10)

Blow Job Hang Ups And Desert Dry Mouth. (42:01)

Ridiculous Mishap List. (48:42)

Almost Arrested for Public Indecency? (53:57)

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135: Sex Mishaps: Anal Oopsies, Lost Tampons and Condoms, Blow Job Gag Reflexes, and Near-Arrests