Joyful Courage for Parenting Teens Eps 223: Decolonizing Parenting With Yolanda Williams
Today’s guest is Yolanda Williams. Conscious parenting is really close to her heart, and she knows what it feels like to grow up without a voice and with violence as a consequence. Raising a black child in a world filled with white supremacy can seem insurmountable at times but she firmly believes that conscious parenting is activism against racism. Yolanda is raising a carefree child to be her authentic self, unafraid to use her voice to stand up to oppression with unshakable confidence and self love. Yolanda wants to help teach other parents to do the same. She's the co founder of Conscious Parenting Time, whose mission it is to decolonize minds by teaching the art of conscious parenting to raise intellectually spiritually and socially free black children. She's also the host of Parenting Decolonized, a podcast on a mission to shine the light on how colonization has impacted the black family structure and what to do about it. Join us!
"I'm not here to make anybody else feel comfortable with the truth of racism, but it's supposed to make you uncomfortable.”
“If I feel like you are genuinely asking a question and I don't feel like you're trying to center yourself when you ask this question, I will politely answer it. But my job is not to educate white people on racism. That's not the job of any person of color.“
“Being White and Whiteness are two separate things. I don't think people really realize that because whiteness is a construct, just like race is.”
“Our culture does judge black parents more harshly. Period.”
“Our kids may already be targeted just because of their race, nothing that you can do is going to stop a bad police officer or a bad teacher or someone who is just a racist from being that person.”
“I'm not going to change who I am to make white people comfortable.”
What you’ll hear in this episode:
- The difference between being White and Whiteness
- How the Black parenting experience is different
- The subtle and not so subtle ways that parenting has been colonized
- Post-Traumatic Slave Syndrome
- The risks and challenges that come with parenting from a place of fear
- Parenting a Black child as a Black person vs as a White person
- Authoritarian parenting attitudes and dignity double-binds
- Belonging and significance in the face of racism
- Internalized racism - what it is and what it looks like
- How early unconscious biases show up in education
- Cultural pride as a way to insulate against racism
- Curating an environment that centres cultural pride
- The importance of Black history
- Being intentional about decolonization
- The Black Panther and their policy
What does Joyful Courage mean to you?
You know, when I think of joyful courage it makes me think of this quote by Audrey Lord and it's like the basis for everything I do. She said, "Raising black children, female and male in the mouth of a racist, sexist suicidal dragon is perilous and chancy. If they cannot love and resist at the same time, they will probably not survive." So that's like love and resistance. Yes, what joyful courage is for me. I mean, I have to have courage to change the status quo. And I have to model what joy and unconditional love looks like inside my home. Because home is where security and safety is and love. And as scary as being a black parent is sometimes I can't tell you how much joy it gives me to be raising my daughter in this revolutionary way and to watch her grow into an amazing black woman. Like, it gives me a lot of joy. I love that.
Resources:
Amazon Prime documentaries by Henry Louis Gates, Jr.
Where to find Yolanda:
Parenting Decolonized Facebook Page
Conscious Parenting Time Facebook Page
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