Being Well with Forrest Hanson and Dr. Rick Hanson

Attachment, and Cultivating Nonattachment

Jun 13, 2022

The hosts explore the intriguing relationship between attachment and suffering through Buddhist teachings. They differentiate between healthy and unhealthy attachments while discussing personal experiences. The conversation highlights the necessity of mindfulness and self-awareness in managing desires. Listeners learn how to embrace change and cultivate emotional awareness to foster healthier relationships. By accepting the transient nature of life, they discover paths to greater peace and joy.

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INSIGHT

Clinging vs. Attachment

Suffering originates from clinging, not simply attachment.
This clinging stems from a sense of lack or thirst, driving unhealthy desires.

INSIGHT

Healthy vs. Unhealthy Desire

Healthy desire is distinct from unhealthy clinging.
Unhealthy desire arises when we pursue problematic ends through problematic means.

ANECDOTE

All Good Things End

Forrest wanted to continue playing chess after a game ended.
Wally, his father's friend, taught him that "all good things come to an end."

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You might have heard the line “attachment is the root of suffering.” It comes from the Buddha, but you don’t have to be a Buddhist to recognize that becoming overly attached to a particular outcome, person, or view of yourself can lead to a lot of suffering. At the same time, there are clearly things that are sensible to be attached to – like our loved ones, a basic moral compass, and fundamentals like food and shelter. So, what’s the problem with attachment?

On this episode of Being Well, Dr. Rick and Forrest Hanson discuss the problem with attachment, what differentiates healthy and unhealthy forms of attachment, and what we can do to relax attachment over time.

Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube.

Key Topics:

0:00: Introduction

2:10: Learning from Buddhism without trying to be a Buddhist

8:45: Two kinds of suffering

12:00: Distinguishing healthy desire and unhealthy desire

19:40: Markers of problematic attachments

24:10: Self-concept, and an example from Forrest of relaxing attachment

30:25: Balancing "Right View" and nonattachment

42:25: Pain and release

50:55: What’s useful for you?

55:45: Recap

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