"My Toddler Doesn't Behave This Way with Anyone Else!"
Mar 7, 2018
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Parent seeks advice on handling 16-month-old's challenging behavior during diaper changes. Emphasizes importance of trust and firmness in mother-toddler relationship dynamics. Discusses understanding and responding to child's emotional needs with empathy.
16:22
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Quick takeaways
Child's behavior with parents may differ due to perceived safety for emotional expression.
Parental confidence and firm guidance are crucial for managing challenging behaviors with toddlers.
Deep dives
Understanding Child Behavior with Primary Caregivers
The podcast delves into a parent's query about the different behavior of her 16-month-old child with her compared to other caregivers. Despite her efforts to engage meaningfully during diaper changes, her child displays more resistance and distress primarily with her. This behavior may stem from the child perceiving the mother as a safe space to express emotions, leading to increased defiance and challenge-seeking behaviors.
Embracing Confident Parenting
The podcast underscores the importance of parental confidence and firm yet loving guidance during challenging situations like diaper changes. By reframing the child's resistance as a normal part of development and the need for a strong parental presence, the podcast advocates for approaching such moments with decisiveness and unwavering assurance. Encouraging parents to view the child's struggle as an opportunity for bonding and setting appropriate boundaries with reassurance and trust is highlighted.
Building Parental Resilience and Leadership
In emphasizing the significance of parental resilience, the podcast suggests that children, especially toddlers, work to shape their caregivers into confident leaders. By recognizing and responding to the child's need for a steady and unwavering parental figure, parents can navigate challenging behaviors with strength and compassion. The episode encourages parents to embrace a leadership role rooted in trust, self-assurance, and the recognition of children's need for guidance and stability during tumultuous developmental phases.
Janet answers an email from a parent who feels her 16-month-old is more emotional and defiant with her than other caregivers. She cites diaper changes as a particularly stressful example of his acting out and wonders, “Is this a sign that I am doing something wrong, or that I am a safe person to share emotions with?”
For more advice on common infant/toddler parenting issues, please check out Janet's books at Amazon and Audible (adbl.co/2OBVztZ).
Also available for download, her audio series "Sessions" -- recorded consultations with parents discussing their most immediate and pressing concerns (SessionsAudio.com).
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