The Leading Edge in Emotionally Focused Therapy 75. The Stuck Series: When Validating One Frustrates Another
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Feb 13, 2024 This insightful discussion tackles the challenge of validating one partner's feelings without triggering frustration in the other. It highlights the delicate balance needed in emotionally focused therapy, emphasizing compassionate communication. The hosts explore attachment theory, emotional triggers, and the significance of shared experiences in nurturing intimacy. With practical strategies, they guide therapists on fostering understanding and connection, while spotlighting the pitfalls of communication that can hinder emotional safety.
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Therapist Self-Regulation
- Therapists must develop a secure self and non-anxious presence.
- This allows responsiveness without reactivity to client triggers, crucial for navigating challenging sessions.
Still-Facing in EFT
- Validating one partner's experience can trigger the other, hindering progress.
- James Hawkins realized still-facing both partners due to fear reduced his effectiveness and increased his own anxiety.
Building Alliance and De-escalation
- Build alliance by tolerating triggered clients, not by keeping them happy.
- Integrate externalizing receiver language to de-escalate and reframe the situation as a shared, predictable cycle.