For The Love With Jen Hatmaker Podcast Encore Pushing Back On Patriarchal Narratives with Elise Loehnen
Oct 17, 2025
Elise Loehnen, writer and author of "On Our Best Behavior," dives into the cultural conditioning of women and the patriarchy's impact on behavior expectations. She explores how the seven deadly sins have been weaponized to police women's actions, pushing them towards 'goodness' while men pursue power. Elise discusses the dangers of female envy and internalized policing, the societal implications of male privilege, and the importance of disruption for future generations. Her insights on changing narratives offer a hopeful path toward compassion.
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Author's Personal Origin Story
- Elise describes her background: mother of two boys, writer, former Goop chief content officer turned author and podcaster.
- She framed her book as arising from curiosity about why women are held to different moral standards than men.
Goodness Versus Power Framing
- Loehnen: "Women are trained for goodness; men are trained for power." is a central framing of the book.
- That framing explains why reputational harm disproportionately threatens women while men retain access when powerful.
Patriarchy Hurts Boys Too
- Loehnen warns patriarchy harms boys by severing feelings and producing wounded men.
- She argues men are granted leniency when perceived as powerful, unlike women who face swift reputational punishment.
