125. The Power of Curiosity in Finances, Relationships, and Life with Scott Shigeoka
Nov 14, 2023
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Curiosity expert Scott Shigeoka discusses the power of curiosity in finances, relationships, and personal growth. They explore the connection between curiosity and understanding others, as well as the benefits of curiosity in navigating tough conversations. The episode emphasizes the importance of setting boundaries and fostering deep connections through curiosity.
Being curious about others fosters stronger relationships by making them feel seen, heard, and valued.
The D.I.V.E framework for deep curiosity involves Detaching from assumptions, Intending to be curious, Valuing the other person, and Embracing curiosity in challenging moments.
Embracing curiosity releases dopamine, reduces anxiety, increases life satisfaction, and strengthens relationships, including those involving finances.
Deep dives
The Power of Curiosity in Building Connections
Being curious about others helps them feel seen, heard, and appreciated, leading to stronger relationships. This applies not just to romantic partnerships, but to all relationships. The act of being curious creates a sense of value and connection, while the absence of curiosity can fracture relationships.
The Framework for Deep Curiosity - D.I.V.E
The D.I.V.E framework is a set of core principles for deep curiosity. 'D' stands for Detach, letting go of assumptions, biases, and certainty. 'I' is for Intend, creating the mindset and setting for curiosity. 'V' is for Value, recognizing the dignity of the person you're curious about. 'E' is for Embrace, welcoming curiosity in challenging and transformative moments.
The Health Benefits of Curiosity
Curiosity releases dopamine, the happy hormone, in our brains. It reduces anxiety and fear, increases life satisfaction, and leads to more fulfilling relationships. Embracing curiosity also has a positive impact on our overall well-being, making us happier and healthier.
Curiosity as Both an Intellectual and Heart-based Pursuit
Curiosity is often seen as an intellectual pursuit, focused on gathering knowledge. However, it is also a powerful tool for connecting with others on a deeper, emotional level. Curiosity in relationships, such as discussing money, fosters understanding, appreciation, and strengthens the bond between partners.
The Importance of Curiosity in Relationships
Curiosity plays a crucial role in building and maintaining strong relationships, including those involving finances. Engaging in financial conversations involves understanding the emotions and values attached to money, rather than focusing solely on numbers and calculations. Cultivating curiosity during these conversations requires active listening and asking open-ended questions. For instance, instead of immediately judging a partner's purchase, asking 'tell me more' can uncover deeper meanings behind their financial choices. Additionally, seeking outside perspectives and learning from others' experiences can provide valuable insights for improving financial conversations and finding unique solutions.
The Intersection of Curiosity and Boundaries
While curiosity is important, it is equally vital to establish and respect boundaries. Curiosity should not infringe upon another person's well-being or autonomy. It is essential to navigate conversations with empathy and not demand answers that individuals may not be ready or willing to share. Boundaries are crucial for maintaining healthy relationships, and it is imperative to apologize and seek forgiveness when boundaries are unintentionally crossed. By understanding the balance between curiosity and boundaries, individuals can foster deeper connections and create a safe space for open and respectful communication.
Curious or indifferent — which best describes the way you approach life? Whether you’ve thought about the answer to this question or not, you’ll want to tune in to today’s episode. In this in-depth conversation, host Tori Dunlap explores the profound connection between curiosity, money, and matters of the heart with Scott Shigeoka, curiosity expert and author of “SEEK: How Curiosity Can Transform Your Life and Change the World.” Together, they examine the power that curiosity holds in our lives, from navigating difficult conversations to helping overcome fear and understanding other’s experiences. If you’re someone who values human connection and introspection, this episode will put you on the path to living a more inquisitive, enriching life.