How to Be a Better Human How to stop sabotaging your romantic relationships (with Raquel Peel)
Jul 19, 2021
Raquel Peel, a Psychology and Counselling Lecturer at the University of Southern Queensland, brings her expertise on romantic self-sabotage to the conversation. She reveals how our own beliefs and behaviors can undermine relationships. Raquel discusses the importance of self-awareness in breaking harmful patterns. Personal anecdotes illustrate the power of vulnerability in fostering connections. By shifting perspectives and prioritizing accountability, we can navigate love with intention and leave self-sabotage behind.
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Defining Romantic Self-Sabotage
- Romantic self-sabotage is a destructive pattern of attitudes or behaviors.
- These are used to impede success, withdraw effort, or justify failure in relationships.
Why We Self-Sabotage
- Self-sabotage is often unintentional, stemming from a desire to protect oneself from anticipated hurt.
- This creates a win-win scenario where the saboteur feels justified regardless of the relationship outcome.
The Cycle of Fear
- Raquel Peel's research revealed a prominent theme of fear in self-saboteurs' narratives.
- This fear becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy, leading to the very hurt they try to avoid.