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Startup Dad

Emotional intelligence, navigating race and fatherhood in the UK | Ben Williams (father of 2, advisor at PLGeek.com)

Aug 31, 2023

56:28

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Ben Williams, VP Product at Snyk, discusses the stigma of therapy in the UK, his experiences with racism, meeting his wife on a dating app, the challenges and joys of being a dad, growing up in a strict household, the rollercoaster of fatherhood, and the differences in parenting between the UK and the States. Hilarious stories about birthing class are also shared.

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Quick takeaways

The stigma surrounding therapy in the UK, particularly men's mental health, highlights the need for a cultural shift in embracing therapy and mental health support.

Balancing work and family life as a father is challenging, and sacrifices are necessary, both personally and professionally, to prioritize family.

Having a strong support network is crucial for parents, including friends from parenting classes and the involvement of grandparents, to navigate the challenges of parenthood effectively.

Deep dives

Taboo around therapy in UK and importance of mental health support

In the podcast, the speaker discusses the difference in attitudes towards therapy between the US and the UK. They highlight the taboo surrounding therapy in the UK and the stigma associated with mental health, particularly men's mental health. They emphasize the importance of therapy and how it has benefited them as a couple and parents.

1.

Introduction

2min

2.

A Discussion on Ben Williams' Professional Background

3min

3.

Career, Upbringing, and Racism

6min

4.

Becoming Parents and the Journey of Parenthood

18min

5.

Navigating Sibling Dynamics

17min

6.

Podcast Interviews and Teaching Kids about Heritage

3min

7.

Parenting Q&A Rapid-Fire

7min

Ben Wiliams is a product and engineering executive and was most recently the VP Product at Snyk; an $8B developer tools company. He is currently a Product and Growth advisor and owner of PLGeek.com as well as The Product Led Geek Newsletter. Ben is a husband and father of two kids and my first international interview (he hails from the UK).

In this episode we discuss:

The importance of therapy in a successful career and marriage and how it's stigmatized in the UK

His early exposures to racism and his upbringing in a mixed race family in the UK

Meeting your wife on a dating app

The challenges and joys of being a Dad

Growing up in a strict household

How a career never prepares you for the rollercoaster of fatherhood

Sacrifices you make to be more present

How life is different for parents in the UK than the States

Building a robust support network

Hilarious stories about "birthing class."

Rapid Fire - UK edition

—

Where to find Ben Williams

- Twitter (aka X): https://twitter.com/semanticben

- LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/semanticben/

- Product Led Geek Newsletter: https://www.plg.news/

Where to find Adam Fishman

- Newsletter: https://www.fishmanafnewsletter.com

- LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/adamjfishman/

- Twitter (aka X): https://twitter.com/fishmanaf

- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/startupdadpod/

- Threads: https://www.threads.net/@fishmanaf

—

In this episode, we cover:

[2:06] Welcome

[2:47] Professional background

[4:55] Career prepped for parenting?

[5:17] Childhood family environment/racism

[10:06] Partner/kids

[13:15] Earliest memory of being a dad?

[14:20] UK prep for baby

[18:06] Making sacrifices

[22:26] Risk awareness

[23:17] UK/USA parenting/mental health

[26:23] Emotional intelligence

[29:29] How do kids get along?

[31:28] Support structures

[33:36] Parenting frameworks

[36:32] Partner disagreement

[39:31] Mistake as a father?

[40:46] Comfort zone in parenting

[41:15] Work/home balance

[47:22] Talking to kids about racism

[49:20] Rapid fire round

—

Show references:

The University of Manchester

Polycystic ovary syndrome (PCOS)

National Childbirth Trust (NCT)

In vitro fertilization (IVF)

Brazilian jiu-jitsu (BJJ)

Fresh Food Feeder

Playmobile Large Princess Castle

Sinclair ZX Spectrum

—

Production support for Startup Dad is provided by Tommy Harron at http://www.armaziproductions.com/

Episode art designed by Matt Sutherland at https://www.mspnw.com/

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit startupdadpod.substack.com

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