The Jordan Harbinger Show 1198: Caroline Fleck | Harnessing Validation to Deepen Human Connection
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Aug 19, 2025 
In this engaging discussion, Dr. Caroline Fleck, a psychologist and author of "Validation Is King," illuminates the crucial role of validation in deepening human connections. She explains how validation differs from praise and can enhance resilience, even aiding in pain tolerance. Authentic validation helps in various contexts, from parenting to therapy, and is key for effective communication. Listeners learn practical strategies to nurture curiosity and truly connect with others, emphasizing the power of attentive listening and emotional reflection.
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Seven-Year-Old Confidant Memory
- Caroline Fleck describes a memory of a friend's mother confiding about her husband's affair when Fleck was seven.
- The adult crisis felt appropriate to Fleck then and sparked her early role as a confidant.
What Validation Actually Is
- Validation signals mindfulness, understanding, and empathy to make someone feel seen and accepted.
- It differs from praise by communicating acceptance independent of performance or appearance.
Validation Changes Physical Endurance
- Validation measurably increases willingness to endure physical pain in experiments.
- Being validated restores people’s willingness to persist and cooperate under stress.