Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families #1080 - Q&A: Lazy Husband & Sleep Struggles
An anonymous listener shares their frustration and exhaustion with a husband who feels more like an additional child than a partner, offering little support with household and family responsibilities. Justin unpacks "weaponised incompetence" and the unfairness and resentment that build when one parent is left carrying the load and provides guidance on how to address the issue in a way that avoids blame, accusations, and an all-out conflict.
Michelle, from Victoria, has a daughter experiencing mental illness, with chronic insomnia, anxiety, and friendship issues—all leading to a feeling of exhaustion and desperation in the home. Justin shares some ideas with Michelle that will help her struggling daughter, emphasising the importance of finding what ignites delight in your child—and giving them more of it!
In this episode:
- Weaponised incompetence
- When one parent feels overwhelmed, exhausted, resentful
- Be honest (without accusations or blame)
- Setting clear expectations and solutions
- NDIS
- Couples meeting
- Getting on the same page
- Enabling laziness
- Autism, ADHD, chronic insomnia, anxiety
- Importance of sleep and bedtime routine
- Extra-curricular activities
- Validating emotions
- 3 basic psychological needs: autonomy, competence, connection
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Related links:
- #452 Weaponised Incompetence
- Parenting On The Same Page [Webinar]
- We Need to Talk About Parent Wellbeing
- A Grown Up’s Guide to Worry Stacking (and how to help kids kick it!) [Download]
- Riding the Waves: Tools for Taming Anxiety [course for kids and teens]
- #310 Bedtime is the Right Time
- #990 Mental Health Challenges with Anne Hollonds
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