Former members of the Two by Twos, Kyle and Kari, discuss their personal stories of deconstructing their beliefs, the apocalyptic focus of the religion, the peculiar structure of the group, and how the pandemic led them to question their beliefs. Stay tuned for next week's episode for more on their Facebook group and devastating news.
The COVID-19 pandemic played a significant role in the deconstruction of beliefs for some members of the Two by Twos, highlighting contradictions and lack of unity within the group.
Notable differences in practices and beliefs exist between the East Coast and West Coast branches of the Two by Twos, particularly regarding divorce and remarriage.
Former members Kyle and Kari discuss the strict expectations, isolation, and challenges of maintaining friendships within the religious group, as well as their deconstruction of beliefs and the impact it had on their marriage.
Deep dives
Overview of the Two by Twos religion and their secretive nature
The Two by Twos is an exclusivist worldwide religion that has been around since the late 1890s. They do not have an official name for themselves and are primarily known as the Two by Twos. The group holds gospel meetings in homes and does not have official church buildings. The ministers, known as workers, travel in pairs and are celibate. There is a hierarchy within the group, with overseers holding more power. The group has strict rules on dress, such as wearing skirts and dresses for women. They discourage activities like going to movie theaters and dancing. LGBTQ individuals are not accepted, and any form of excommunication is viewed as condemnation to hell. The group has seen a decline in membership over the years, and their secretive nature makes it difficult to estimate the exact number of members.
The impact of COVID-19 on the Two by Twos and personal stories of deconstruction
The COVID-19 pandemic played a significant role in the deconstruction of beliefs for some members of the Two by Twos. The group exhibited a lack of unity and guidance, with different overseers handling the pandemic differently. Some members expressed denial and conspiracy theories about the virus, while others took precautions. The contradictory messages and the leader's dismissal of the importance of protecting each other from COVID-19 caused cognitive dissonance. The refusal to acknowledge COVID-19 deaths within the group and the denial of its severity further shattered faith and highlighted the lack of value placed on members' well-being. Personal stories shared by former members revealed the pain, confusion, and slow process of deconstructing beliefs.
Differences between East Coast and West Coast practices and beliefs
There are notable differences in practices and beliefs between the East Coast and West Coast branches of the Two by Twos. On the West Coast, divorce is discouraged but allowed under specific circumstances. However, if a person gets remarried after a divorce, they are not allowed to participate fully in the meetings and are excluded from professing. Divorced individuals are encouraged to remain single for the rest of their lives. These beliefs contrast with the East Coast branch, where divorce is generally not accepted and remarriage is strictly forbidden. The contrasting views on divorce and remarriage create a divided line of beliefs within the group.
Deconstruction of Belief and Identity
The podcast episode explores the experience of two individuals, Kyle and Kari, who grew up in a religious group referred to as 'meetings'. They describe the strict expectations and pressure to conform within the church, where being 'professing' is prioritized above all else. The speakers reflect on their early years, characterized by being fully immersed in the meetings and viewing the outside world as sinful and evil. They discuss the challenges of maintaining friendships with non-professing individuals and the constant need to be an example due to the belief that they may be the only Bible someone reads. The hyper-vigilance and anxiety associated with this lifestyle is described, along with the sense of not truly belonging in the world and feeling separate even though they are a part of it. The speakers touch on the topic of funerals, which the group uses as opportunities for gospel meetings rather than focusing on honoring the deceased. The summary also highlights the insular nature of the group, the lack of written rules or cohesion, and the tendency towards scrip velocity. The deconstruction of belief and the departure from the church by one of the speakers is discussed, leading to challenges in their marriage as they navigate different belief systems. The summary ends with the speaker mentioning how their understanding of politics and social justice issues played a role in their deconstruction process.
Revelations of Sexual Abuse within the Group
The second part of the episode addresses a letter sent out by the group, revealing the dark side of a deceased overseer, Dean Brewer. It is disclosed that he engaged in sexual predation and abused his authority within the community to control and manipulate victims, including minors. The letter shares that evidence was discovered on his computer and phone, along with records indicating his frequent visits to motels often with two guests. The podcast emphasizes the devastating impact on the victims and expresses concerns about possibly more unidentified victims. The summary mentions the recommendation made by the group to implement preventative measures like the Ministry Safe program. However, doubts are raised regarding the effectiveness of such programs, as there were individuals within the community who were aware of Dean's actions but did not report them. The summary concludes by acknowledging that part two of the episode will delve further into the unfolding events and the importance of spreading awareness and seeking the truth.
Former members of the Two by Twos Kyle and Kari (the group that our Meagan grew up in) discuss the apocalyptic focus on the religion, personal stories of deconstructing their beliefs, the peculiar structure of the group led by pairs of ministers called "workers", how Kyle and Kari joined and met as kids, how it compared to Meagan's experience, what they did (and didn't) believe growing up, how the pandemic led them to question their beliefs, and how they found their way back to each other after a difficult period of disconnection. Stay tuned next week to learn about the Facebook they created for former members and the devastating news that came to light.
Trust Me is brought to you by Progressive! Quote today at Progressive.com to try the Name Your Price® tool for yourself, and join the over 29 million drivers who trust Progressive!
Got your own story about cults, extreme belief, or abuse of power? Leave a voicemail or text us at 347-86-TRUST (347-868-7878) OR shoot us an email at TrustMePod@gmail.com