157: The Emotionally Healthy Man: How to Feel Without Shame with Chris O'Neil

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Teaching men to feel isn’t about making them less masculine—it’s about making them whole.

Sometimes it seems as if anger is the only emotion men are allowed to show—but beneath it lives grief, fear, and unmet needs seeking to be heard.

Chris O’Neil’s mission is simple: help men feel again without shame, fear, or judgment. In this episode, he unpacks the emotional myths that hold men back and gives practical, grounded tools for reclaiming inner balance, strength, and peace.

In this powerful and deeply honest episode, we’re joined by Chris O’Neil, an emotions coach dedicated to helping men and fathers reconnect with their emotional selves. We dive into the cultural myths around masculinity, the emotional isolation many men experience, and how to cultivate emotional strength—not by shutting down, but by tuning in. Chris shares insights, tools, and stories that offer hope and direction for men ready to heal and those who love them.

🧠 Key Topics Covered:

💬 Chris’s Journey:

• From massage and bodywork to coaching: recognizing men’s disconnect from the body.
• Realizing men are taught to think through emotions, not feel them.
• The drive to help men become whole, embodied, and emotionally aware.

🧍‍♂️ The Emotional Experience of Men:

• Common struggles: avoidance, suppression, and the “I’m not going to let this affect me” mindset.
• Men and grief: Where do men go to cry, process, and be seen?
• Why emotions aren’t weakness—they’re wisdom.

🧱 Breaking Down the Stereotypes:

• “Boys don’t cry” and the myth of the “strong, silent” man.
• Why anger often masks deeper emotions like sadness or fear.
• Authentic masculinity includes emotional depth.

🧍 Society’s Role:

• The damage of binary thinking: strong vs weak, masculine vs feminine.
• How emotional suppression links to PTSD and disconnection.
• In relationships: reactive vs responsive behavior—and how it plays out with partners and children.
• Why misogyny isn't “men being men”—it’s unprocessed pain turned outward.

🛠 Emotional Tools for Men:

• Community: Create safe spaces to share, like monthly Zoom calls.
• Emotion Wheel: Go deeper than just "mad, sad or glad"—become more familiar with other emotions to gain insight.
• I Statements: Own your emotion—“I feel ___ and that’s okay.”
• Grounding Practices: Breathing, presence, and regulating through the body.
• Understanding the Nervous System: The vagus nerve, fight-or-flight, and “parenting yourself” through emotional storms.
• Key lesson: The emotion isn’t the problem—your response is.

💡 Standout Quotes:

• “Being emotional doesn’t make you less of a man. It makes you more of a human.”
• "Women can be confident and aggressive. Men can be compassionate and empathetic. They are not mutually exclusive."
• "Setting boundaries isn't about controlling others. A boundary is for you...it's about you taking reciprocal action to disrespect."
• “This isn’t about replacing masculinity—it’s about redefining it.”

✅ Follow Chris O’Neil for more grounded and transformative content on emotional healing for men.
📲 TikTok: @Dadding_Daily

Email: DaddingDaily1980@gmail.com

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