Is lust okay in marriage? That’s a loaded question.
Dan Keefer joins the podcast to unpack the answer.
Stopping to consider lust in your marriage may be new to you. We’ll take the first step to define and understand what lust means. There are so many layers. And this conversation is careful to help you understand them. Picking and choosing parts of your spouse to focus on deconstructs the person you married.
We’re going to look at your spouse and lust more thoughtfully. We’ll go beyond fantasy so sexual intercourse becomes an expression of connection versus selfish wants. This look at lust points out it’s what we do with it; using phrases like “If Only…Then” can take our good, God-given desire and steer it somewhere it doesn’t belong.
So, is lust okay in marriage? Let’s listen and find out.
Highlights:
Lust is using another person or using their image for selfish, sexual gratification
Sexual Intimacy: Something that is born out of the relationship, born out of the connection. out of seeing one another
Lust: comes from a heart of dissatisfaction, taking an aspect of another person and believing that IF ONLY this were different, THEN I would be in a better spot
Homework:
- “An act of selflessness has the potential to build desire.” What do selfless acts look like in your marriage day to day? (Setting the coffee machine the night before, doing the dishes, filling up the gas tank, scheduling a date night)
- Rather than acting with the end goal of having sex; shift to consider what would it look like to build desire in the moment.
- HOLD HANDS with your spouse: allow yourself to be saturated in the oxytocin that’s released from intertwining your fingers & saturated in the oneness of that intimacy.
Transcription:
Full Transcription Available here
Original music by Shannon Smith. Audio engineering by Gabriel @ DelMar Sound Recording.
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Free Resources to help you on your journey to Becoming Whole
👉Men's Overcoming Lust & Temptation Devotional
👉Women 21-Day Prayer Journal & Devotional - (Women overcoming unwanted sexual Behavior)
👉Compass 21-Day Prayer Journal & Devotional - (Wives who are or have been impacted by partner betrayal)