Prepare the Mind for Negotiations

Transcript

Welcome to our podcast, Salary Negotiations Made Simple!

I'm your host Dorothy Mashburn, and welcome to Salary Negotiations Made Simple! Here I show you how negotiating doesn't have to be overwhelming. 

 I break the entire process of negotiating into easy-to-learn steps that you can use in any salary negotiation situation - whether you're starting a new job or preparing to ask for a raise.

 Expect to receive practical, actionable strategies that are based on real-life experiences.

 I'll be sharing tips that have been proven to work where professionals like you have netted $10 - $40k more in compensation.

 It’s payment for the skills you bring – so you need to know how to ask for payment for those skills.

Are you ready to learn how to boost your earnings? 

 Let's dive in! 

Welcome to today's episode of "Prepare the Mind" where we'll be exploring a series of short exercises to help you get ready for any negotiation.

Have you ever been caught off guard by a difficult conversation or negotiation?

In those moments, having a few tools at your disposal can help you maximize the value from the conversation.

That's why I'm here to share practical tips that you can implement before any negotiation. So, get your notepad ready, or feel free to replay this podcast as many times as you need to, because we want to make sure you have all the tools you need to succeed in asking and receiving more money and benefits.

Let me ask you this: Did you know that the best things in life are on the other side of difficult conversations? That's what the American Negotiation Institute says, and I couldn't agree more.

But sometimes, we're hesitant to have those conversations, especially when it comes to negotiating for a salary increase, asking for a promotion, or even just discussing an issue with a coworker.

 

So, what's stopping you from having those conversations?

 

Is it anxiety, nervousness, or feeling overwhelmed?

 

Take some time to think about the root of those feelings. Maybe you're afraid of rejection or worried about damaging a relationship. But don't let those feelings hold you back.

The question is, how can you move forward with confidence?

This is why we are here today.

Let’s assume you have 2-3 days prior to a negotiation.

• I want you to grab a piece of paper and write down why you're feeling that way.
• Take a moment to acknowledge those emotions, and don’t edit yourself.
• Just write it all down. After that, take a day to step back and don’t think about it at all. Just clear your mind.
• The next day, take another piece of paper and write down how you are feeling today. Take another day.
• Then come back and compare the two pages of writing.

Do you see a difference? I am betting that absolutely 100% you will see an improvement.

Now, let's move on to shorter time frames.

If you have 2 hours before a negotiation, try a meditation technique called grounding.

• Find a quiet and comfortable place where you won't be disturbed.
• Take a few deep breaths and focus on your breath as you inhale and exhale.
• Notice the sensations in your body, such as the feeling of your feet on the ground or the weight of your body on the chair. Start to name the things you can see, hear, touch, smell, and taste in your surroundings.
• Keep naming these things and focusing on your breath until you feel calmer and more grounded.
• This technique can help you stay present in the moment and reduce the impact of anxious thoughts about the upcoming conversation.

Let’s assume you have a negotiation discussion coming up in an hour or less, and you're feeling anxious about it, here's a positive psychology visualization exercise that can help you feel more confident and prepared:

• Find a quiet and comfortable place where you won't be disturbed.
•        Take a few deep breaths and focus on your breath as you inhale and exhale, letting go of any tension or stress.
•         Visualize yourself engaging in the conversation in a positive and successful way. See yourself speaking calmly and confidently, and the other person responding positively. Imagine the conversation going smoothly and ending in a win-win outcome for both parties.
•         If any obstacles or challenges come up during the conversation in your visualization, visualize yourself handling them with ease, staying calm and composed, and finding a positive solution.
•         Keep visualizing the conversation going well until you feel calmer and more confident. You may want to repeat this exercise a few times, focusing on different aspects of the conversation each time.
•         As you finish the exercise, take a few more deep breaths, and focus on the feeling of confidence and positivity that you have cultivated through this visualization.

This exercise can help you approach the upcoming negotiation with a more positive mindset, which can increase your chances of success. By visualizing a positive outcome and practicing your response to potential obstacles, you'll feel more prepared and less anxious, which can help you communicate more effectively and negotiate more confidently.

Finally, if you have less than 30 minutes before your negotiation discussion and need to quickly calm your nerves, a positive psychology technique you can try is called mindful breathing. Here are the steps:

·     Find a quiet and comfortable place where you won't be disturbed.

·   Take a few deep breaths and focus on your breath as you inhale and exhale, letting go of any tension or stress.

·        Bring your attention to your breath and notice the sensation of the air flowing in and out of your nose or mouth. Focus on the rise and fall of your chest or abdomen with each inhale and exhale.

·        If your mind wanders, gently bring your attention back to your breath, without judgment.

·        Continue breathing mindfully for a few minutes, letting any thoughts or sensations come and go without getting caught up in them.

·        Do this for 10 minutes.

·    As you finish the exercise, notice how your body feels and take a moment to appreciate the present moment.

Mindful breathing can help you regulate your breathing and slow down any racing thoughts. It can help you stay present in the moment which can help you approach the conversation with a clearer and more focused mind.

Recently, I have been talking about experimentation a lot. Experimentation allows us to step away from a perfectionist mindset.

And try the things that look hard. And once you try it, it of course gets easier each time. Am I right?

So, here's what I want you to do next:

The next time you are planning to have a difficult conversation try using one or more of the techniques we discussed today.

Remember that negotiation is a skill that can be learned and improved with practice.

Don't be too hard on yourself. The first time might be awful. And that’s ok. No one gets everything right the first time. This is why we are doing these practice conversations!

Take note of what went well and what could have been improved, and use that knowledge to improve your skills for your negotiations for the job offer or a pay raise.

So there you have it, some practical exercises and tips to help you prepare your mind for any negotiation.

Remember to acknowledge and work through any anxieties or fears you may have, reframe the conversation as a problem-solving discussion, and find ways to practice.

Thanks for listening to today's episode of "Prepare the Mind” on our Podcast Salary Negotiations Made Simple.

Be sure to tune in to our Podcast on Tuesday morning next week, where we will be talking about using a framework from social psychology to help establish a deep connection with our negotiation counterparts!

In the meantime, check out my website dorothymashburn.com/fightforyourworth ; subscribe and boost your income with a step by step audio training guide on salary negotiations.