Almost Adulting with Violet Benson There’s No Fairytale Ending w/ Todd Baratz
It can be a hard pill to swallow, but you can’t also become the person you want to be if you’re stuck in the past. There’s no fairytale or storybook ending if you don’t fix what’s within, but that doesn’t mean you have to do it alone!
Today we welcome sex and relationships therapist, Todd Baratz! Todd has devoted his entire life to wellness as he actively works against all formalities, traditions and diagnosis. Together Violet and Todd discuss the importance of intimacy negotiation in a relationship, identifying self sabotaging behaviors, and how to fill emotional voids. The two also deep dive into the myth of being “relationship ready”. The truth is, there’s no such thing. Relational love leads to self love. Besties, sometimes the real breakup you need is with your old patterns and behaviors.
Contact Todd and find his online courses here: https://www.toddsbaratz.com/
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What to Listen For:
- 00:00 Introduction
- 01:02 What it means to start therapy at 10 years old
- 05:03 “I literally just said your partner has fantasies…”
- 08:07 Couple issues tend to come from personal trauma
- 10:17 Our relationships are emotional
- 14:02 Everybody deals with relationships at different pace
- 15:35 Self-sabotaging
- 18:45 Why are we drawn to emotionally unavailable people
- 22:23 How can you tell if someone is emotionally unavailable?
- 23:25 When should you walk away?
- 25:23 Lies that we hear about relationships
- 27:11 It’s normal to sit with your feelings
- 30:03 How do you deal with uncertainty?
- 32:29 The pressure to succeed with relationships
- 35:39 Where’s the line between feeling and thinking?
- 37:56 Stop blaming people about your feelings
- 46:41 Feeling the victim all the time
- 39:38 Why does language matter so much?
- 43:47 Self discovery happens, it’s not a rush
- 46:39 Being the victim constantly
- 50:01 Can you still be in a relationship while still working on yourself
- 52:27 Good habits to make yourself feel better
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