Her Best Self: Freedom from Disordered Eating, Body Obsession & Perfectionism EP 235: Feel the Fear & DO IT Anyway, Get Support Anyway! ~ Why Recovery Anxiety Is Your Green Light to Freedom
What if the fear you feel about getting help for your eating disorder isn't a warning to stay away - but actually your internal compass pointing toward freedom? In this powerful episode, Lindsey shares wisdom from her 7-year-old son who said, "When I feel those flutters in my tummy, I just know I'm about to do something really brave." If you're feeling afraid to ask for help, scared to gain weight, or terrified of actually getting better, this tough-love episode will show you why those butterflies are your invitation to do the bravest thing you've ever done.
Key Takeaways- Fear isn't a stop sign - it's a compass pointing toward your breakthrough
- If you could recover on your own, you already would have
- Those flutters aren't warning you away from help - they're pointing you toward it
- You don't feel brave first and then act brave - you act brave while feeling scared
- Ready is a feeling that comes AFTER you take action, not before
- Lindsey's son facing his first day of second grade without his big brother
- "When I feel those flutters in my tummy, I just know I'm about to do something really brave"
- How children understand fear differently than adults
- Kids feel scared and do the thing anyway - adults build cases for why they should wait
- Fear of asking for help (admitting you can't do this alone)
- Fear of gaining weight (worth tied to a number on the scale)
- Fear of actually getting better (losing your eating disorder identity)
- Fear of investing in yourself (what if you spend money and don't change?)
- If something feels scary, it must be wrong for you
- Heart racing when thinking about help = "not the right time"
- Anxiety about meal plans = "body not ready"
- Terror about recovery = "maybe not meant for me"
- Truth: Fear means it matters, it's important, you're about to grow
The "Safety" Illusion:
- Staying sick feels familiar = brain labels as "safe"
- Recovery feels unknown = brain labels as "dangerous"
Reality Check - How "Safe" Is:
- Spending every moment thinking about food
- Missing life because you're afraid of restaurants
- Measuring worth by what you ate yesterday
- Living in constant body anxiety
- Isolating because eating around others feels impossible
- Admitting you need help when you want to prove independence
- Following someone's guidance who has been there and recovered when ED voice screams it's too much
- Gaining weight when diet culture says smaller is better
- Investing money in recovery when you've never felt worth it
- Showing up to therapy and being honest instead of pretending you're fine
Children: Feel scared → Do the thing anyway Adults: Feel scared → Analyze, overthink, research, wait
Adult Excuses:
- "I'm not ready yet"
- "I need to think about this more"
- "I should try on my own one more time"
- "What if it doesn't work?"
- "I can't afford it right now"
- Sick feeling about calling a coach = "This way to freedom"
- Anxiety about meals = "This way to healing"
- Terror about recovering = compass pointing toward the life you've been dreaming about
- "Fear isn't a stop sign. Fear is a compass pointing you toward your breakthrough."
- "If you could recover on your own, you already would have."
- "Fear doesn't mean it's wrong. Fear means it matters."
- "Those flutters aren't telling you to run from recovery - they're telling you you're about to do something incredibly brave."
- "You don't feel brave first and then do brave things. You do brave things while feeling scared."
Questions to Consider:
- How's playing it safe working out for you?
- How's trying to manage this ED on your own been going?
- How's waiting until you feel "ready" been serving your recovery?
The Reality:
- Everything you're afraid of losing by being brave, you'll replace with something infinitely better
- Playing it safe = staying in a familiar prison
- Taking action despite fear = walking toward freedom
Not perfection, but:
- Being willing to be imperfect in the direction of healing
- Reaching out for professional help despite vulnerability
- Following meal plans despite ED resistance
- Gaining weight despite diet culture programming
- Investing in yourself despite never feeling worth it
- Showing up to therapy even when you want to cancel
Two Choices:
- Let fear drive your bus (stay stuck in eating disorder)
- Feel the fear and drive anyway (choose recovery despite butterflies)
The Truth:
- Butterflies aren't telling you to turn around
- They're telling you you're at the edge of your comfort zone
- All growth happens outside your comfort zone
- You feel afraid to ask for help with your eating disorder
- You're waiting to feel "ready" before taking action
- You've been trying to recover on your own without success
- The thought of gaining weight terrifies you
- You're tired of living with constant food and body thoughts
- You keep making excuses for why "now isn't the right time"
- Felt nervous about first day without big brother
- Could have played it safe (stayed home)
- Chose to feel the butterflies and walk into brave
- Result: Made three new friends, came home with huge smile
- Everything he feared losing, he actually gained
Stop waiting to feel ready. Ready comes AFTER action, not before.
- Notice when you feel butterflies about recovery
- Recognize this as your compass pointing toward growth
- Take one brave action despite the fear
- Apply for help at herbestself.co while feeling scared
Those butterflies you feel about getting help aren't your intuition telling you to wait - they're your soul telling you you're about to change your entire life.
Stop analyzing your fear and start acting despite it. Go to www.herbestself.co right now and apply to work with Lindsey.
Feel the fear. Apply anyway. Your freedom is waiting.
Connect with Lindsey- Website: www.herbestself.co
- Private Facebook Community: Her Best Self Society www.herbestselfsociety.com
- Client Applications: HBS Co. Recovery Coaching - Client Application - Google Forms
Lindsey Nichol is a former competitive figure skater turned God-led entrepreneur, boy mom, and digital CEO. She believes the butterflies you feel about recovery aren't warning you away from help - they're pointing you directly toward your freedom.
If this episode gave you the push to finally take action, share it with someone who needs to hear that fear is their compass, not their enemy. Your support helps more women discover their brave.