Soft Skills Engineering Episode 493: My boss one-ups my negativity and football engineering
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Dec 29, 2025 This episode dives into the tricky dynamics of one-upmanship in the workplace, exploring strategies to reframe complaints into constructive requests. The hosts also discuss a listener's career dilemma between a mentorship-rich team role and a solo developer position with a prestigious football club. They outline the risks of working alone too early, emphasizing potential burnout and stagnation in skills. The importance of switching teams for fresh growth opportunities is highlighted, making this an insightful discussion for anyone navigating their career path.
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Turn Complaints Into Requests
- Clarify the outcome you want when you complain to a skip-level manager.
- Ask for specific changes or expectations instead of stating feelings to force a constructive response.
One-Upping Often Means Dismissal
- One-upping someone often signals dismissal or a desire to address a different premise.
- Go directly to the heart of the issue in limited skip-level time to avoid unproductive exchanges.
Use Skip-Level Time Strategically
- Use your skip-level time to ask concise, outcome-focused questions about expectations.
- If you want recognition, state that explicitly so the manager can respond appropriately.