A Buddhist, formerly involved with Satanism and the Jehovah's Witnesses, shares their journey of leaving the faith, exploring sex, drugs, and serial killers. They discuss the damaging effects of growing up in the Jehovah's Witnesses and the contrast between their fascination with Satanic imagery. The speaker also delves into their transition from Jehovah's Witnesses to Satanism, involvement in subcultures and the porn industry, and observations on QAnon.
The narrator's journey from an oppressive Jehovah's Witness upbringing to exploring extreme behaviors such as Satanism and deep involvement with serial killers reveals the impact of religious trauma and the search for empowerment.
Correspondence with notorious serial killers, including the Night Stalker, allowed the narrator to connect with others who understood loneliness and repressed anger, providing an outlet for his rage and trauma amidst his exploration of Satanism and the metal scene.
After a period of rebellion and destructive behavior, the narrator finds healing and empowerment through mindfulness and sobriety, using his experiences to help others cope with religious trauma and substance abuse.
Deep dives
Leaving a Cult: Escaping Jehovah's Witnesses
Growing up in a strict Jehovah's Witness community, the narrator experienced emotional and physical abuse. The religion and its cult-like tendencies led to feelings of repression and anger. After leaving, he turned to the opposite extreme, exploring Satanism, drugs, and heavy metal music. He also had correspondence with notorious serial killers, including the Night Stalker. Although he doesn't glorify their actions, he saw a connection between his anger and destructive behavior. Eventually, he found empowerment through mindfulness and sobriety, using his experiences to help others cope with religious trauma and substance abuse.
The Impact of Jehovah's Witness: Emotional and Mental Damage
The narrator describes Jehovah's Witnesses as a highly controlling and damaging religion. The fear of being disfellowshipped and shunned by the community had a lasting impact on his mental health. He experienced religious trauma, physical abuse, and constant pressure to conform to the rigid rules of the faith. Leaving the Jehovah's Witnesses brought a sense of freedom, but also anger and a desire for rebellion. Through indulgence in drugs, heavy metal music, and exploring Satanism, he sought empowerment and relief from the oppressive environment.
Corresponding with Serial Killers: Seeking Connection and Empowerment
After leaving the Jehovah's Witnesses, the narrator engaged in correspondence with serial killers, including the Night Stalker. He was initially drawn to the artwork and strange fascination surrounding these notorious murderers. While he never justified or glorified their actions, he saw the exchange as a way to connect with someone who understood loneliness and repressed anger. The exploration of Satanism and involvement in the metal scene provided an outlet for his rage and trauma, though he eventually found healing in mindfulness and sobriety.
Finding Empowerment through Mindfulness and Sobriety
After a period of rebellion and destructive behavior, the narrator found solace and empowerment in mindfulness and sobriety. He turned his experiences into a means of helping others cope with religious trauma and substance abuse. Although the journey was difficult, he learned the importance of connection, community, and personal growth. Through his own path to healing, he provides support and guidance to those who have experienced the damaging effects of religious institutions and addiction.
From Collecting Serial Killer Memorabilia to a Healthier Lifestyle
The podcast episode delves into the guest's personal journey from the obsession with collecting serial killer artwork and memorabilia, to eventually selling the collection and transitioning into a healthier lifestyle. The guest reflects on how his upbringing as a Jehovah's Witness and experiences with rage and trauma led him to seek extreme behaviors, such as engaging in the drug and party scene, as well as being involved with the porn industry. However, as the guest progressed in his spiritual and personal growth, he shifted towards mindfulness, sobriety, and forging healthier relationships, eventually finding stability and happiness in his current marriage.
The Sensationalized World of Tabloid Talk Shows and Exploitation
The podcast episode also explores the guest's disturbing experience being involved in the Jerry Springer Show, where his then-girlfriend worked as a fluffer for a record-breaking sexual competition. The guest recounts the fabricated drama orchestrated by the show's producers, including a staged confrontation and his participation in the deception. In an unexpected turn of events, he reveals how one of the other participants secretly filmed a sexual encounter with host Jerry Springer himself, resulting in an unsuccessful attempt to sell the footage and the show being shelved. The discussion highlights the exploitation and fakeness of tabloid talk shows, shedding light on the dark underbelly of the entertainment industry.
This week's caller is a Buddhist by way of Satanism by way of the Jehovah's Witnesses. These days, he's a mindfulness teacher, but the road there was long and eventful. He tells Gethard about leaving the faith he was raised in and finding sex, drugs, and serial killers along the way. Content Warning: This episode contains discussions of sensitive topics, including explicit conversations about sex, drug use, and correspondences with a serial killer in prison.
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