Finding Mastery with Dr. Michael Gervais

Body Language Expert: The #1 Habit That Makes You Unforgettable | Vanessa Van Edwards

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Oct 22, 2025

Vanessa Van Edwards, a behavioral researcher and bestselling author, dives into the fascinating world of body language and its impact on human connection. She shares how posture and presence can convey confidence, and why warmth should precede competence to build instant trust. Vanessa also discusses practical tips for overcoming social awkwardness, like using better questions and developing micro-social skills for kids. With insights on eye contact and vocal habits, this conversation offers a blueprint for authentic communication that resonates.

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INSIGHT

Body Language Often Matters More Than Words

Your body speaks louder than words in first impressions and ongoing connection.
Posture, eye contact, tone and presence change how others perceive you and how you make them feel.

ADVICE

Ditch Generic Conversation Openers

Break social autopilot by avoiding generic openers like "How are you?" and "What do you do?".
Use a specific, curiosity-provoking first question to create memorable interaction starters.

ANECDOTE

Honesty Turned A Mansion Party Around

Vanessa introduced herself as "an awkward person" at a mansion party and immediately loosened the room.
People responded by admitting their own awkwardness and then came to talk to her honestly.

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What if the key to deeper connection isn’t in what you say — but in how your body speaks, listens, and moves?

On today’s episode, we sit down with Vanessa Van Edwards — behavioral researcher, bestselling author, and founder of Science of People. A self-described “recovering awkward person,” Vanessa turned social anxiety into a science-backed toolkit anyone can use to improve communication, connection, and leadership. Vanessa studies what happens beneath words: how posture, tone, eye contact, and presence shape how we’re perceived and how we make others feel.

Together, we explore the subtle science of connection — from how warmth and competence support charisma to the micro-cues that determine trust, likability, and confidence. This is an episode for anyone who wants to show up with authenticity, read the room better, and make their communication more impactful.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

How to use posture and physical space to project calm confidence
Why warmth must come before competence to build trust fast
How to eliminate vocal fry and question-inflection for stronger communication
The key to spotting and disarming contempt before it festers
How to teach kids “micro social skills” that build courage and connection

It’s a grounded, science-backed guide to showing up with more presence — and helping others feel at ease in your orbit.

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