The discussion kicks off with the shift in labeling kids from 'picky eaters' to 'selective eaters,' emphasizing the power of choice. It dives into the emotional struggles of managing multiple ambitions and the fear of letting go. The conversation encourages reassessing personal goals, advocating that quitting isn't failure but a pathway to realignment. Listeners learn the importance of turning their energy toward more meaningful pursuits, especially when it comes to sustainable goal-setting. It's all about making conscious, empowering choices!
Reframing the concept of quitting as a positive choice allows individuals to realign with their authentic goals and priorities.
Being selective about goals emphasizes the importance of manageable commitments, particularly when evaluating New Year's resolutions for sustainability.
Deep dives
The Importance of Selectivity in Goal Setting
The idea that one can do anything but not everything is crucial for individuals, especially those with ADHD, when setting goals. It emphasizes the need to choose focus areas wisely, particularly at the start of a new year when many are evaluating their resolutions. Being selective allows for a more manageable approach, highlighting that it's essential to prioritize commitments and avoid the stress of trying to juggle too many obligations. This understanding encourages individuals to accept that it is acceptable to have secondary focuses but to recognize the primary goal and not equate the inability to fulfill all commitments with failure.
Reframing the Concept of Quitting
Quitting is often viewed negatively; however, it can be a necessary and positive step towards rediscovering one’s priorities. It's important to differentiate between quitting due to realignment with authentic desires versus quitting in the face of a challenging situation. Recognizing that some pursuits may no longer align with personal goals helps validate the choice to quit, as illustrated by past experiences of abandoning obligations that didn't contribute to personal growth. This realization offers clarity and reinforces the idea that quitting should be perceived as redirecting energy towards more meaningful pursuits rather than a sign of failure.
Sustainability in Pursuing Goals
Focusing on sustainability is key when pursuing goals, especially as challenges arise that may lead to feelings of overwhelm. Adjusting one's approach to make goals more achievable is crucial; for example, rather than an extreme dietary restriction, one can opt for smaller, manageable changes, like hosting a friend for a healthy recipe night. Recognizing that the journey toward any goal is iterative allows for moments of reflection and adjustment, ultimately leading to better long-term outcomes. Individuals are encouraged to assess whether current strategies are working for them and to be flexible in how they pursue their objectives to maintain motivation and commitment.
I was recently thinking about kids being picky eaters and how there is a movement where we’re not supposed to say picky anymore; we’re supposed to say they’re selective eaters.
And you know what, I get that. I grew up as a picky kid, and… let’s be honest, I’m a fairly picky adult as well. Scratch that, selective adult.
And I know it’s semantics, but I often find semantics are important. Because if we’re reframing this idea of being picky into being selective, it loses a lot of that negative connotation, and it gives a lot more power to the idea that what we’re doing is we’re making choices. In this case, making choices about food, but I think this is something we should keep in mind as we’re moving into the new year because a lot of us are going to find that we’re going to need to be more selective with our goals, especially in regard to New Year’s Resolutions.
And this is the idea that we’re going to be exploring in this episode - what are the things that we really want to focus on doing - what are the things that we want to commit ourselves to, and then what are the things that we should be letting go of.
If you'd life to follow along on the show notes page you can find that at HackingYourADHD.com/208
This Episode's Top Tips
You can do anything, but you can’t do everything. If something feels draining, unaligned, or no longer serves you, it’s okay to move on.
Work on reframing quitting as a positive. We’re redirecting our energy toward something more meaningful and prioritizing those things that we really want.
Focus on sustainability. If a goal feels overwhelming, reassess and try to find a more manageable way to approach it.
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