Episode 178: Stop Trying to Change Others - Do This Instead
Jun 6, 2022
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Learn how to effectively motivate change by using motivational interviewing techniques, understanding change talk and sustain talk, and developing discrepancy. Discover the power of evoking hope and giving individuals the freedom to make choices when helping them embrace change.
Motivational interviewing is a more effective approach to facilitating change than directing people and telling them what to do.
Using the skills of open-ended questions, affirming strengths, reflective listening, and summarizing can shift conversations towards seeking positive change and evoking hope.
Deep dives
The Importance of Guiding, Not Directing
In this podcast episode, the main idea revolves around the importance of guiding people rather than directing them when it comes to facilitating change. It is emphasized that nobody likes to be told what to do, as it results in conflicts of wills and resistance. Instead, an approach called motivational interviewing is recommended, which involves being a non-anxious presence and helping individuals explore their potential for change. The three types of approaches outlined are directing, following, and guiding, with guiding being the most effective in giving individuals the emotional space and freedom to make their own choices.
Motivational Interviewing and Changing Talk
The podcast episode discusses the use of motivational interviewing in facilitating change. This approach involves four primary skills: open-ended questions, affirming strengths, reflective listening, and summarizing (OERS). By using these skills, individuals can shift the conversation from sustain talk (resistance to change) to change talk (seeking a better future). The episode also introduces the DARN acronym as a guide for evoking desire, ability, reasons, and the need for change. In addition, developing a sense of discrepancy between the current and desired state and evoking hope is emphasized. Finally, the importance of specific planning and maintaining personal differentiation is highlighted to support the self-determination of individuals in their change processes.