E22: How Herpes Simplex Virus Impacts D/s with Guest Emily
Mar 9, 2023
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Guest Emily shares her experiences of engaging in a D/s dynamic after testing positive for HSV. Topics include symptoms and transmission of HSV, impact on play with her Dom, navigating stigma, intimacy in D/s relationships, community support, and importance of seeking medical attention for HSV.
Establishing boundaries after a herpes diagnosis can enhance a D/s dynamic.
Open communication and education help combat stigma around HSV in the kink community.
Deep dives
Understanding HSV and its Impact on Kink
Emily shares her experience living with genital HSV, highlighting that a diagnosis didn't deter her kinky lifestyle; it actually improved after establishing boundaries. She aims to support individuals in the kink community with chronic STIs, emphasizing that life doesn't end. HSV, specifically HSV-1 and HSV-2 distinctions, symptoms like flare-ups, nerve pain, and shedding without symptoms are discussed.
Testing and Screening for HSV
Testing for HSV in North America is notably absent from routine STI screenings, not viewed as a priority due to its commonality. Antibody blood tests or PCR swabs during outbreaks are the primary test options, with varying reliability. The lack of standard testing creates challenges in accurately detecting the virus, contributing to misconceptions and misunderstandings.
Addressing Stigma and Disclosure Challenges
Emily navigates HSV stigma by being open with friends and partners, disclosing her status upfront. While stigma surrounds STDs, she finds support in online communities and advocates for transparent conversations and awareness. Reactions vary, with most partners understanding and focusing on maintaining safe practices and intimacy despite the diagnosis.
Personal Impacts and Emotional Resilience
Emily embraces her HSV diagnosis as part of her journey, joining supportive communities and educating herself. Initially fearing isolation and rejection, she found acceptance within herself and with partners, shaping a positive outlook. Her experiences lead her to promote informed decisions, shared consent, and proactive health measures to overcome stigma and misunderstandings around HSV.
In this episode of the Conversations with a Dom BDSM podcast Moineau and Chief talk to Emily, a reader who emailed in asking if she could share her experiences of engaging in a D/s dynamic after testing positive for the Herpes simplex virus (HSV).
We talk about:
What HSV is and what the symptoms are
How Emily contracted Herpes
What she does and doesn't do in her dynamic to keep herself and others safe
How it impacts play with her Dom
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