In this insightful discussion, Coach Michael, a relationship coach known for his expertise in emotional intelligence, joins AJ and Johnny to explore the concept of emotional bids. They reveal how these subtle invitations can strengthen relationships, yet often go unnoticed. The trio shares groundbreaking research linking positive responses to emotional bids with relationship success. They also discuss the importance of active listening and the detrimental effects of ignoring these bids, providing actionable strategies to foster deeper connections in both personal and professional life.
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insights INSIGHT
Emotional Bids Predict Relationship Success
Dr. Gottman's "Love Lab" study revealed that couples who stayed married responded positively to emotional bids 86% of the time.
Divorced couples only responded positively 33% of the time, highlighting the importance of emotional bids in relationship success.
volunteer_activism ADVICE
Listen Beyond the Surface
Focus on the emotional layer beneath the words, not just the words themselves, to truly understand the meaning.
Recognize that emotional bids are about connection and shared experiences, not just surface-level information exchange.
volunteer_activism ADVICE
Validate Negative Emotions
Don't dismiss negative emotions; offer support.
Turning towards negative bids means validating and acknowledging the other person's feelings without judgment.
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In today's episode, we show you the cheat code to building deep relationships with AJ, Johnny, and Coach Michael.
Discover the secret language of connection in today’s episode as AJ, Johnny, and Coach Michael dive into the concept of emotional bids — the small, powerful moments that make or break our relationships. Why are emotional bids so vital to our personal and professional lives? How can we recognize them, and what happens when we ignore them? AJ and Johnny break down the science of emotional bids, share practical strategies to strengthen your connections, and reveal how simple shifts in awareness can transform the way you interact with others. Whether you're looking to deepen your personal relationships or enhance your influence at work, this episode is packed with actionable insights to help you build lasting, meaningful bonds.
What to Listen For
Introduction – 00:00:00
What are emotional bids, and how do they serve as subtle invitations to connect?
Why do so many relationships fail due to a lack of awareness about emotional bids?
Why is recognizing emotional bids a critical skill for relationship success?
How does ignoring your partner’s emotional bids lead to disconnection and eventually the end of the relationship?
The Science of Emotional Bids – 0:07:30
How can you predict the success or failure of a relationship based on 3 minutes of interaction?
What role does active listening play in identifying emotional bids during everyday conversations?
Why is it essential to focus on the emotions behind the words, rather than just the words themselves?
What strategies can make you more memorable and likable after just one conversation?
How to Identify Emotional Bids – 0:18:48
What exactly is an emotional bid and how do you recognize them in conversation or in your relationship?
What are the Most Common Emotional Bids? – 0:27:30
What are common types of emotional bids, such as bids for attention or emotional support?
What does it mean to "turn toward" an emotional bid, and why is it the foundation of lasting relationships?
How can "turning away" or "turning against" emotional bids contribute to relationship breakdowns?
What are the three ways to respond to emotional bids, and which response guarantees failure?
Leverage Emotional Bids for the Strongest Relationship – 0:48:02
What simple exercises can help you become more aware of emotional bids in your daily interactions?
How can a lack of attention to emotional bids lead to divorce or long-term relationship issues?
Why do emotional bids reflect vulnerability, and how does responding positively encourage deeper connection and trust?