Life Coaching with Christine Hassler EP 252: Why Do I Feel Like I Am Not Making Any Progress? With Anna
This call is about doing deep inner child work. Today’s caller, Anna, is being blocked by a defense mechanism and doesn’t feel she is making progress in her personal development work. We talk about how she can come back to love and remove judgment. It is useful to reach out externally for support, however, we have to be our own internal support as well. The help she needs will come from within.
[For show notes go here: Christinehassler.com/episode252]
When you feel you are backtracking in your personal development, know that what is really happening is that a trigger is exposing a deeper layer so you can go to a deeper level of healing and love.
Our behaviors, coping strategies, and our defense mechanisms are all there to protect us from hurt and confirm our biases. People who have low self-worth and think their value comes from doing will be very critical of themselves and will constantly try to do and create a result.
When our ‘come from’ is “I’m broken,” “I hope this fixes me,” or “something is wrong with me,” it slows down our healing because the energy that our personal development is riding on is judgment rather than love.
As we learn to meet our own needs and tend to the little one inside of us and make the place inside of us that feels not enough, or not worthy, make it known that our needs ARE valuable and worthy. And, as we realize our needs are valuable and worthy, we then unconsciously train other people about how to meet our needs better and we are able to consciously ask people to meet our needs better.
Are you being called to lead, love, or make a difference? Join me and Stefanos for our Love Amplified Live retreat in Austin, Sept 24–27. This retreat is all about the love of self, love of others, and love of your higher power. There will be workshops, breathwork, and partner breakouts. Come, share, and grow. Get more information at ChristineHassler.com/retreat.
The last weekend of August, we are offering a Virtual Inner Child Workshop. This event is for those ready to do deep, internal work. Visit ChristineHassler.com/innerchild or email Jill@ChristineHassler.com. If you can’t attend the workshop in its entirety you will have access to it for 30-days.
Consider/Ask Yourself:
- Do you feel like you're backtracking or not making progress in terms of your personal development?
- Do you experience great frustration with your life, work, relationships, or where you live?
- Growing up, did you feel like your needs were met? Did you feel like your parents understood you, saw you, and knew how to meet your needs?
- When it comes to yourself and your path, do you approach it with love, compassion, and acceptance, or with judgment and frustration?
Anna’s Question:
Anna feels that time is passing in her life but she isn’t making any progress; she would like guidance on how to move forward.
Anna’s Key Insights and Ahas:
- She feels she is not making progress in life.
- She feels other people judge her.
- She is unhappy in her work, community, and relationships.
- Her parents were emotionally unavailable.
- She gets depressed when she is not accomplishing things.
- She felt her needs didn’t matter and couldn’t be met.
- She has consistently searched externally to get her needs met.
- She helped raise a family member.
- She feels angry and hurt that her parents weren’t there for her.
- She has built a wall around her heart.
- She adopted self-criticism as a defense mechanism.
- She is not broken.
How to Get Over It and On With It:
- Realize she is the only one that can meet her needs.
- Deeply connect with her little girl and feel her feelings.
- Reflect internally without judgment and support and trust herself.
Takeaways:
- Look at your ‘come from’ in your personal development. Up your self-compassion and talk to that little one inside.
- Join us in August for the Inner Child Workshop.
- Think of how you’d be with a child or animal. How would you meet their needs? How would you anticipate their needs? Use this to access how to meet your own needs.
- Acknowledge your progress.
Resources:
Christine Hassler — Join the Free Over It and On With It Community
Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner
Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler
@ChristineHassler on Instagram
Assist@ChristineHassler.com
Jill@ChristineHassler.com — For information on any of my services.
Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show.