Why You Take Things Personally (and What to Do Instead)

Do you replay conversations in your head, second-guess your words, or feel a wave of shame from just one comment or look?

You’re not too sensitive and you’re not alone. You’re simply human with a nervous system doing its job to protect you.

In this episode, we unpack why you take things personally and what you can do to shift that response. This isn’t about “toughening up” or just thinking positive. It’s about understanding the neurobiology behind emotional reactions and learning how to regulate your state so you can respond with clarity, not collapse.

🔍 What You’ll Learn:

• How your nervous system interprets disapproval as a threat

• Why “story follows state”—and how to shift both

• The “slime” analogy for handling criticism

• A powerful mindset tool called the “second score”

• How to create emotional space between stimulus and response

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🕰️ Timestamps:

03:27 – Why thinking differently isn’t enough

03:55 – Survival wiring and neuroception

05:20 – Strategy #1: Critique behavior, not identity

06:25 – Separate who you are from what you did

06:56 – Strategy #2: Reframe criticism as feedback

07:44 – The “Slime” analogy for handling feedback

10:02 – Brené Brown’s arena metaphor: who deserves your energy?

10:52 – Not all feedback deserves full volume

11:16 – Strategy #3: Mind reading and nervous system state

12:20 – Story follows state: Team Hyper, Hypo, and Resilient

13:37 – The Safety Sequence: Regulate before you reframe

14:27 – Strategy #4: Track and anticipate your personal triggers

15:12 – Strategy #5: Validate your emotions first

16:07 – Strategy #6: The Second Score – how you respond matters

18:19 – Criticism as a growth opportunity

18:40 – Final thoughts: It’s not a mindset flaw—it’s your nervous system

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🧠 Explore More Tools

📝 Get my Resilience Journal to support your healing journey:

📌 Amazon US: https://www.amazon.com/s?k=Mental+health+Journal&hidden-keywords=B0DNRSLV9F&ref=nb_sb_noss_1

📌 Amazon CA: https://www.amazon.ca/Mental-Journal-Anxiety-Management-Self-Care/dp/B0DNRSLV9F/ref=sr_1_1

🧘‍♀️ Join the Nervous System Journaling Club

→ https://www.skool.com/nervous-system-journaling-club/about?ref=06e003b61b8148ebbafd3a067f3cc2e1

🎓 Learn more:

→ The Advanced Nervous System Resilience Training: https://www.amazon.com/Mental-Journal-Anxiety-Management-Self-Care/dp/B0DNRSLV9F/ref=sr_1_1?dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.aXvnLQ5iNMBUxzQYYcrgjg.Ygo_CcAbKDLG3ax4WgUAUannnVgrozTHO0DU3k-rSfw&dib_tag=se&keywords=Mental%2Bhealth%2BJournal&qid=1748849188&sr=8-1&th=1

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