Breathe Love & Magic Grandmothers Threw Paint At Me And Pushed Me Into The Fire
The story begins on St. Patrick’s Day, when I did a Celtic shamanic journey to connect with Merlin. Nearly three years ago, he first appeared in a meditation and told me I was embarking on a spritual adventure.
There’d be no map, no guide, and no goal. Just blind trust so I can learn to go with the flow. At the bottom of these show notes you can find links to other Spiritual Adventure Updates.
My Spiritual Adventure Continues
Let me tell you, it’s hard! I like a little direction. I don’t need a detailed itinerary, but a basic idea of where I’m headed? That’d be nice. But Spirit had other plans. I was told – No plan. Just try things. Trust the unfolding.
So, I did. I hosted full moon events, started an intuitive mastermind—nothing quite stuck. Still, I love creating and I keep going.
Then I found Sharon McErlane’s books and the Net of Light. Sharon channels the Great Council of the Grandmothers, and something clicked. Their mission resonated deeply – to raise the yin energy globally and restore the balance of masculine and feminine on the planet.
I’m from the generation that followed Gloria Steinem and was part of the second wave of women who flooded the corporate world in the ’80s. So, the idea of empowering women is part of my history and DNA.
Shamanic Journey with Merlin
Okay, back to Merlin. During the St. Patrick’s Day shamanic meditation, I stepped into a boat with no oars and let the current take me. Dolphins and small whales surfaced, nudging the boat forward which was fun!
When I landed, a great black hawk greeted me. It was massive and stood beside Merlin, wings flapping as if to get my attention.
Merlin had a message for me. He said I was doing well on my journey. He likened me to a meandering brook—not quite a river yet, still finding my way. He cautioned me not to push the river which means not to rush things.
“Let it come. You’ll become a river in time.” Classic Merlin, metaphorically fascinating and a bit vague.
Afterward, I looked up the meaning of this giant black hawk. The bird I saw is called a Great Black Hawk, symbolizing strength, transformation, divine connection, and higher perspective. It represents a call to trust my intuition and step into purpose.
Ancestors of the Land
Weeks later, I heard a story on a podcast about a man from Germany who came to the US and wanted to buy land in Arizona. He couldn’t afford it, but went to meditate on the land.
The spirits of the land came to him, saying they wanted someone who would honor it like him. A series of miracles followed, and he purchased the land!
Hearing this gave me full-body chills. That story felt like a message about working with the ancestors of the land. Days later, while reading a book from the Grandmothers series, I learned to heal the Earth, you have to first connect with the ancestors of the land and your own ancestors too.
That message landed twice in one week. I’d never been interested in my ancestors. Beyond one grandmother, they had all passed before I was born. Now, I started to wonder if ancestral healing is part of my path? I decided to investigate further.
Shamanic Journey to the Grandmothers
On April 9th, I did another shamanic journey to meet the Grandmothers. I saw them dancing around a fire on the plains. I said hello, and after greeting me, they pushed me into the fire!
It didn’t hurt (I was safe in dreamtime), and I know fire is transformative and purifying. Then came a wild shift – I started to grow taller and taller, until I was the size of a redwood.
From that height, the fire looked tiny, the size of a penny. Interesting. Then, I shrank back to normal and came out of the journey.
What was that about? I sat with it. Growing tall gave me perspective, but maybe it also meant I was stepping into a more expanded, grounded version of myself. Like the redwood, vast and steady with deep roots.
Spiritual Container
On April 14th, I met the Grandmothers again—this time in a forest at night. They greeted me and began dancing around me. “Get to know us,” they said, “and we’ll get to know you.”
I started to grow again—not redwood-size, but big enough that the hem of my skirt filled the entire circle. I felt myself brushing against my own power—and stopped. I didn’t want to overwhelm or overstep.
Later, I realized the circle they created wasn’t a limitation. It was probably more like a container, holding me while I grew. Again that’s interesting.
By April 25, something was shifting. I felt electrically connected to nature. Alive. More powerful. And it hit me that I might not be just a meandering brook anymore, but perhaps advanced to the river.
So I asked the grandmothers in shamanic journey, “If I’m a river, who are you?” The Grandmothers answered, “We are the aquifer.”
Chills. The aquifer—silent, essential, underground. While I move along the surface, they are the deep, ancient source that sustains everything on earth. That made perfect sense.
Splashed with Paint
Then came May 5th. In another shamanic meditation with the Grandmothers, I was pushed into their circle again, but this time, they splashed me with yellow ochre paint.
It was a sacred moment. Yellow is the color of the solar plexus representing confidence, identity, power. However, this ochre was ancient, primal, and earthy. It felt like an initiation.
I did a little research and found that being pulled into a circle like that is a spiritual activation. And the paint? Could be a sign of belonging. I was being welcomed in.
Maybe a Test?
The last journey I’ll share happened just this week—May 12. And wow, was it a big one.
This time, the vision felt more involved. I saw the Council of Grandmothers standing on the Great Plains. They didn’t waste any time. As soon as I arrived, they asked me, “Why are you here?”
I took a breath and answered from the heart, “I’m here for myself… for other women… and for the world.” Good thing I said that—because I felt it was a test. And apparently, I passed.
They told me to open my heart and breathe through it. So, I did.
Then they showed me something extraordinary. They had woven a blanket for me—a stunning, sacred piece of art. Right in the center was a vibrant field of golden yellow. Framing it were bands of bright, vivid orange above and below. And then on each end was a bold stripe of deep purple.
Gift of the Thunderbird
The centerpiece was a large, black thunderbird woven into the golden yellow section. It was stylized and angular, not realistic.
Naturally, I looked it up. The thunderbird is one of the most sacred beings in many Indigenous traditions. It’s a messenger of the Great Spirit and a sign of powerful protection and spiritual authority.
The thunderbird shows up when you are being entrusted with something big—sacred gifts or spiritual wisdom meant not for personal gain, but for the good of the people.
Suddenly, their earlier question, “Why are you here?”, made even more sense. What a gift from this shamanic journey!
Then I asked, “Is there anything else you want to tell me?” First, they threw more paint on me. This time, yellow ochre and turquoise. I love turquoise. (Thank you, Grandmothers.)
And this paint felt like a blessing. A finishing touch on a sacred rite. Turquoise relates to the throat chakra, authentic expression, truth-speaking. But it also symbolizes spiritual upgrade, elevated vision, and soul expression. In other words, all the good stuff.
Love Yourself, Love the World
Then they told me, “Love yourself. To love yourself is to love the world.”
They said that by focusing on self-love, I would heal not just myself, but my family, my friends, my community, my country, and beyond.
“Allow this love to ripple out around you,” they said.
And I got the sense this was energetic truth. That kind of self-love is not selfish—it’s exponential healing. Imagine if everyone began to love themselves like that. What kind of world could we create? Now I’m not getting grandiose about this. I don’t think I’m better than anyone else. I’m just a woman walking her path, like everyone else.
Yes, this sounds kind of amazing and as shamanic journeys go, I’m pretty happy with them. But I still don’t know what it really means. What’s expected of me? What’s coming next? I have no idea. What will this look like in my practical, daily life? Still no clue.
What’s Next?
Am I still on a spiritual journey to nowhere? Yep, but what a ride it’s become.
And if nothing else, I can promise this – I’ll keep showing up. I’ll keep listening. And, I’ll keep sharing what unfolds.
Even though I’m still on this journey to nowhere without a map, now I’m flowing like a river, moving with divine feminine power. The Grandmothers are guiding and I’m paying attention.
If you’d like to meditate with the Grandmothers, email me at Ronnie[@]IntuitiveEdge.biz and let me know. Or scroll to the very bottom of my website’s home page to sign up for the newsletter. I’m going to offer a Grandmothers’ event soon and if I have your email, I can send you the date and details.
Links to Earlier Spiritual Adventures Episodes
How To Find Joy In The Journey – My Spiritual Adventure Update
Tips To Let Go – The Adventure Continues With This Podcast Snack
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