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Conversations with a Dom

E28: 9 Mistakes Beginner Submissives Make Time and Again (aka How to Protect Yourself)

May 15, 2023
Exploring BDSM can be thrilling yet daunting for beginners. Common mistakes can lead to emotional turmoil, but clear communication and understanding are key to avoiding pitfalls. This discussion emphasizes the importance of defining personal desires, creating a sex menu, and recognizing red flags for safety. Building a supportive community is vital, as well as practicing self-compassion on this journey. It's all about balancing exploration with emotional health and celebrating growth in the kink world.
32:06

Podcast summary created with Snipd AI

Quick takeaways

  • Beginner submissives must pace themselves and reflect on their desires to avoid sub-frenzy and potential emotional harm.
  • Open communication and negotiation about preferences and boundaries are essential for establishing a healthy and fulfilling DS dynamic.

Deep dives

Avoiding Sub Frenzy

Many beginners dive into the dominant-submissive (DS) dynamic with overwhelming excitement, leading them to make impulsive decisions that may result in emotional harm. This initial 'sub frenzy' often causes novices to overshare personal information or engage recklessly with individuals online, creating situations they later regret. It is essential for newcomers to recognize the importance of pacing themselves and reflecting on their actions before acting on impulse. By taking a moment to breathe and consider their choices, beginner submissives can safeguard themselves from burnout and disappointment in their kink journey.

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