Benjamin Hardy, an organizational psychologist and author known for his works on self-limiting beliefs and teamwork, shares insightful strategies for achieving happiness and confidence. He emphasizes measuring progress against your past self rather than unrealistic ideals. Hardy discusses the importance of reframing personal experiences as gains, transforming challenges into growth opportunities, and setting meaningful personal goals. This shift in mindset leads to greater satisfaction and allows you to tailor your life more effectively.
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insights INSIGHT
The Gap and High Achievers
High achievers often live in "the gap", comparing themselves to ideals and feeling negative.
This negativity stems from measuring against what one wishes for, devaluing past achievements.
question_answer ANECDOTE
Children and Hedonic Adaptation
Benjamin Hardy's adopted children, despite experiencing newfound abundance, quickly adapted.
His 10-year-old son became upset when he couldn't drive after seeing his older brother do it.
insights INSIGHT
External Reference Points
Societal systems, like schools, often impose external reference points, fostering comparison.
Social media exacerbates this by showcasing idealized versions of others' lives.
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The Art of Learning takes readers through Josh Waitzkin’s unique journey to excellence in both chess and Tai Chi Chuan. The book explains how a well-thought-out, principled approach to learning separates success from failure. Waitzkin discusses how achievement is a function of a lifestyle that fuels a creative, resilient growth process. He shares his methods for systematically triggering intuitive breakthroughs, honing techniques, and mastering performance psychology. The book also emphasizes the importance of embracing defeat, making mistakes work for you, and turning weaknesses into strengths. It is divided into sections that cover his rise in chess, his transition to Tai Chi, and the similarities in preparation and execution between the two disciplines.
The Gap and The Gain
The High Achievers' Guide to Happiness, Confidence, and Success
Dan Sullivan
Benjamin Hardy
This book introduces the concept of 'The Gap and The Gain', developed by Dan Sullivan, which helps high achievers understand why they are often unhappy despite their accomplishments. It explains that measuring oneself against an ideal (the Gap) leads to dissatisfaction, while measuring against past achievements (the Gain) fosters happiness, gratitude, and motivation. The book is a masterclass on positive psychology, healthy relationships, mental well-being, and high-performance, offering practical advice on how to shift focus to appreciate progress and achieve greater fulfillment and success.
Good to Great
Why Some Companies Make the Leap... and Others Don't
Jim Collins
In 'Good to Great,' Jim Collins and his research team investigate why some companies achieve long-term greatness while others do not. The book identifies key concepts such as Level 5 Leadership, the Hedgehog Concept, a Culture of Discipline, and the Flywheel Effect. These principles are derived from a comprehensive study comparing companies that made the leap to greatness with those that did not. The research highlights that greatness is not primarily a function of circumstance but rather a result of conscious choice and discipline. The book provides practical insights and case studies to help businesses and leaders understand and apply these principles to achieve sustained greatness.
If you measure your current self against your ideal (often chosen and defined by other people rather than yourself), you’ll never be happy because there will always be a gap. Unsuccessful people primarily focus on this (but we all wind up here sometimes).
If you measure your current self against your previous self — and notice the gain you've made between yesterday and today — you’ll experience happiness, satisfaction, and confidence. The most successful people understand this.
The difference between ideals (general, immeasurable, and constantly changing) and goals (specific, measurable, and time-bound) -- and why your ideals shouldn't be your benchmark for achievement, but merely the source from which your goals are inspired.
How you can weed out the arbitrary reference points with which you've been burdened by external sources and choose ones that are actually meaningful -- not just constant reminders of what you don't have.
How the increased confidence that comes from living in the gain allows you to set bigger and more imaginative goals to truly tailor the fabric of your own life.
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