In this episode, they discuss topics such as faith deconstruction, the impact of upbringing, meditative prayer, transitioning to a more unconditional relationship with God, avid reading, Catholic priest, and the challenges of leaving a religious community. They also explore the shift to Eastern Orthodox beliefs.
38:21
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Quick takeaways
Deconstruction can lead to the loss of friendships and severed connections within the church community, highlighting the contingent nature of relationships based on group membership.
Leaving a church and undergoing deconstruction can be a challenging process for older individuals, who may struggle with letting go of beliefs and fearing a loss of security and purpose.
Deep dives
The Impact of Deconstruction on Relationships
The podcast episode explores the impact of deconstruction on personal relationships, particularly within the church community. The speaker discusses their own experience of leaving a church after decades of involvement, highlighting how friendships quickly disappeared once they were no longer part of the tribe. They reflect on the pain and loss that comes with severed connections, recognizing that true friendships may have been contingent upon group membership. The episode also touches on the challenges faced by older individuals going through deconstruction, including the reluctance to let go of beliefs and the fear of losing a sense of security and purpose.
Navigating Harmful Teachings and Changing Beliefs
The speaker shares their personal journey of deconstruction, which was prompted by their wife's experience of sexual abuse and the realization that certain beliefs were harmful. They discuss the struggle of giving up certainty and embracing an unrelenting search for truth. The importance of meditative and contemplative prayer in finding peace and disconnecting from transactional spirituality is emphasized. The episode highlights the significance of being able to let go of certain beliefs or interpretations that no longer serve a healthy understanding of God.
The Challenges Faced by Adult Children in Faith Change
The episode touches on the experiences of adult children who go through their own faith changes. It explores the challenges faced by these individuals as they wrestle with philosophy and attempt to reconcile their evolving beliefs with their religious upbringing. The speaker shares examples of conversations with their son, highlighting how younger generations may find themselves drawn to different expressions of faith, such as Eastern Orthodoxy. They also address the tension that can arise when engaging in theological discussions with adult children who have taken different paths.
The Complexity of Leaving Church Communities
The episode delves into the complexities of leaving church communities, particularly after investing significant time and energy. The speaker recounts their experience of exiting a church plant and later leaving a long-standing church, which resulted in the loss of friendships built over 25 years. The discussion explores the feelings of rejection and the sense of being treated as dangerous or problematic for deviating from the group's beliefs. The speaker reflects on the challenges faced by individuals in navigating the aftermath of leaving a church and the impact it can have on personal identity and social connections.
Dan continues his (occasional) focus on Faith deconstruction amid Baby Boomers by talking with Southern Californian Dan Gross. For the second half of this conversation, join the Patreon @ patreon.com/dankoch