Failure is the Key to Success | CP201

Mar 14, 2025

Failure can feel catastrophic for sensitive or neurodiverse children, triggering self-doubt and anxiety. Yet, it’s also a crucial part of development and resilience. This discussion offers insights into why some kids struggle with failure and presents practical strategies for parents to help them view setbacks as learning opportunities. By building stress tolerance and reframing challenges, parents can guide their children towards emotional growth and success.

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Embracing Failure as a Catalyst for Growth

00:00 • 16min

For some, failure is a motivator, a chance to prove themselves and strive for something even greater. But for others—especially highly sensitive kids, gifted kids, kids with ADHD, or strong-willed Gladiator kids—failure feels catastrophic. Even minor setbacks can trigger overwhelming self-doubt, anxiety, and shame.

The truth is, failure is an essential part of growth. It’s how we learn, build resilience, and ultimately succeed. But for kids who struggle with stress tolerance, failure can feel like an unbearable weight.

In this episode, we’ll explore why some children react so strongly to failure, and more importantly, how we as parents can help them shift their perspective. You'll learn strategies to help your child develop stress tolerance, reframe failure as a stepping stone to success, and build the emotional resilience they need to thrive.

Let’s turn failure into an opportunity for growth—together.

Jennifer's Takeaways:

Understanding Failure and Its Impact on Children (00:00)

Parents' Relationship with Failure (01:58)

The Role of Parental Response (04:15)

Brain Processes During Failure (04:52)

Building Failure Tolerance in Children (08:25)

Practical Strategies for Parents (13:55)

Challenges and Final Thoughts (14:17)

Meet Jennifer Kolari

Jennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in th US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today’s Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.

Kolari’s powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children’s emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.

Jennifer’s wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.

Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.

One of the nation’s leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You’re Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).