When People Push Your Buttons: The Power of Curiosity Over Control With Harvard Psychologist Dr. Stuart Ablon

What do you do when someone you love - whether it’s your kids, a spouse, or a friend - keeps doing the same maddening things? 

This week, we’re tackling how to approach the most frustrating dynamics in any relationship. Dr. Alison is joined by award-winning psychologist Dr. J. Stuart Ablon, founder of Think:Kids at Massachusetts General Hospital, and Associate Professor at Harvard Medical School. 

He shares a game-changing mindset shift: most challenging behavior is about skill, not will.

If you’ve ever thought, “They just don’t care,” about someone you love, this conversation provides a proven, practical path to real solutions. 

This episode explores:

• The five core skills that drive every behavior
• The real reason most people struggle
• How to keep your cool and trade judgment for curiosity
• The exact words that lower defensiveness fast
• Why boundaries still matter—and how to set them collaboratively
• A step-by-step walkthrough of Collaborative Problem Solving in action

For more from Dr. Stuart Ablon, check out his many free resources:

💡For free access to an interactive, self-paced course for parents, go to https://thinkkids.org/Self-Paced-Courses/Parent-Caregiver-Course/ Use code: BestofYou

🏥 Think: Kids at Massachusetts General Hospital 

📚Changeable: How Collaborative Problem Solving Changes Lives at Home, at School, and at Work

Here are some other episodes you might like :

Episode 86: Embracing Conflict—Why It's Essential & 4 Simple Ways to Tackle It

Episode 70: Mastering the Art of Emotional Intelligence—How to Harness the Power of Your Emotions to Improve Your Relationships

📖 Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here

💬 Got a question? Call 307-429-2525 and leave a message for a future episode.

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