I Wish You Knew

When Attachment Becomes a Disorder: Can Personality Disorders Be Fixed? | Adam Lane Smith

Apr 18, 2025

This engaging discussion dives into the connection between attachment styles and personality disorders. It unpacks how childhood trauma influences emotional regulation and interpersonal relationships. Offering a fresh perspective, the hosts critique the traditional medical model and explore unconventional healing methods. The conversation highlights the dangers of overmedication and promotes community support as a pathway to recovery. A compelling metaphor about love and risk illustrates the complexities of attachment and provides listeners with practical insights for fostering secure connections.

01:41:53

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Quick takeaways

The podcast highlights how attachment styles stem from early childhood trauma and can influence long-term mental health outcomes.

Adam Lane Smith challenges the medical model, arguing that understanding attachment and relationships can be more beneficial than relying solely on medication.

Recognizing the spectrum of attachment behaviors helps differentiate between ethical avoidants and those who may engage in manipulative patterns.

Supportive relationships and community engagement are vital for healing attachment issues and fostering personal growth, emphasizing the importance of connection.

Deep dives

Understanding Avoidant Attachment

Avoidant attachment is described as a learned behavior rather than a mental health disorder. Individuals with avoidant attachment often develop this style due to past experiences with hurtful or controlling individuals. The behavior can be changed through awareness and personal growth, but there are ethical avoidants who are simply cautious in relationships, as well as manipulative avoidants who may intentionally harm others. Distinguishing between these types helps understand the nuances of how avoidant attachment affects relationships.

Intro

2min

Understanding the Spectrum of Avoidant Attachment and Personality Disorders

3min

Understanding Manipulation and Attachment Issues

2min

Navigating Attachment and Personality Disorders

8min

Understanding Attachment Issues: Fear, Relationships, and Solutions

2min

Unraveling Personality Disorders

10min

The Neurological Dynamics of Attachment Disorders

14min

Navigating Mental Health: Relationships and Recovery

15min

Understanding Personality Disorders and Mental Health

27min

10.

Navigating Relationships and Mental Well-Being

16min

11.

Navigating Personal Change and Mental Health Challenges

2min

12.

Embracing Community and Healing Through Conversation

2min

In this episode, Andrey and Adam unpack the deep connection between attachment styles and personality disorders. Together, they explore how childhood trauma, neurological stress, and emotional dysregulation contribute to avoidant, anxious, and disorganized attachment—and how these patterns can evolve into more severe conditions like borderline personality disorder, bipolar disorder, and even schizophrenia. Adam challenges the medical model, offering hopeful insights on healing, brain health, and the possibility of recovery without relying solely on medication.

✨ Topics Covered ✨
👉 The difference between attachment styles and personality disorders
👉 How avoidant behaviors can be self-protective—or damaging
👉 The impact of early childhood trauma on long-term attachment
👉 Why the medical model often mislabels people as “broken”
👉 How avoidant attachment differs from avoidant personality disorder
👉 The trauma roots of borderline personality disorder (BPD)
👉 The connection between high-performance households and emotional suppression
👉 What’s really happening in the brain during bipolar disorder
👉 The dangers of overmedication and brain inflammation
👉 Why even schizophrenia can be helped through functional systems
👉 Finland’s powerful approach to treating schizophrenia without meds
👉 How social bonding and oxytocin lead to brain healing
👉 Why chronic stress blocks your potential—and how attachment healing unlocks it
👉 A powerful metaphor about “loving a crocodile” and staying in unsafe emotional patterns

Healing from childhood trauma—especially when it starts as early as age 6—takes courage, patience, and truth. If this conversation helped you feel seen or understood, consider sharing it with someone who’s walking a similar path. You’re not alone—and there’s real hope for healing and freedom.

Stay tuned for more expert insights and relationship advice in future episodes!
If you enjoyed this episode, you will probably love our episode titled ‘Attachment Specialist Fixes an Avoidant Woman’ https://youtu.be/zSaZrRedRUc

Need more help with your attachment? Work with Adam: www.adamlanesmith.com

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Follow Adam Lane Smith:
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Website: https://adamlanesmith.com/
Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCBO093GsMmnA9tb8lZPhbgg
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/attachmentadam/
Twitter /X: https://x.com/AdamLaneSmith
Threads: https://www.threads.net/@attachmentadam
Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentbro

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The next episode drops Thursday :)
See you there.

Visit: https://iwishyouknew.show/ to lean more about the podcast

To Learn More About @AttachmentAdam

https://adamlanesmith.com/
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCBO093GsMmnA9tb8lZPhbgg
https://www.instagram.com/attachmentadam/?hl=en

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I Wish You Knew

When Attachment Becomes a Disorder: Can Personality Disorders Be Fixed? | Adam Lane Smith

Podcast summary created with Snipd AI

Quick takeaways

Deep dives

Understanding Avoidant Attachment

The Spectrum of Attachment Styles

Recognizing Trauma Responses

Impact of the Medical Model

The Role of Relationships in Healing

Red Flags in Relationships

Seeking Professional Help

Remember Everything You Learn from Podcasts