Front Row Dads with Jon Vroman

429: ScreamFree Parenting and the Superpower of Pausing Before Reacting with Hal Runkel

Mar 5, 2024

Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, Hal Runkel, discusses scream-free parenting and the superpower of pausing before reacting. Topics include keeping kids safe while letting them learn, dealing with conflicts, importance of taking a timeout, and finding the balance between overprotection and life lessons.

01:05:17

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Episode guests

Hal Runkel

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Episode notes

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Quick takeaways

Practicing the 'pause' in parenting allows for thoughtful responses, not reactive reactions, fostering growth and self-management in children.

Utilizing the 'pause' as a tool in leadership and relationships shifts responses from instinctual to intentional, promoting effective communication and decision-making.

Balancing protection with life lessons is crucial in parenting, allowing children to face challenges, learn from experiences, and prepare for independence.

Deep dives

Responsibility as an Ability to Make a Response

Hal Runkle emphasizes the importance of taking responsibility, not for others' behaviors, but to demonstrate thoughtful responses oneself. He suggests that the ability to pause in challenging situations is crucial, allowing for a shift from reactive responses to thoughtful decisions. Runkle advocates for acknowledging that one is not responsible for others' actions but is responsible to them, guiding them through choices and consequences to foster self-management and growth.

Introduction

3min

The Power of Self-Focus in Parenting and Relationships

2min

Reflecting on Controlling Parental Reactions in a Moment of Desperation

2min

Journey Towards Scream-Free Parenting

9min

Parenting and Leadership Responsibility

25min

Navigating Parental Frustrations and Personal Growth

16min

Embracing Self-Improvement and the Power of Pausing in Parenting

2min

Promotions, Thank You Messages, and Community Testimonials

6min

Hal Runkel is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, registered conflict mediator, relationship coach, and internationally acclaimed speaker who’s helped thousands of people worldwide enjoy calmer, happier lives.

He’s the New York Times bestselling author of ScreamFree Parenting, ScreamFree Marriage, and the Founder and President of the ScreamFree Institute, and he’s figured out how to make parenting and marriage, you guessed it… scream-free zones.

You’ll hear Hal’s perspective on a topic that keeps many parents up at night: How do we keep our kids safe while also letting them learn from life’s tough lessons?

Hal shares some of his practical routines and strategies anyone can apply to become comfortable with relinquishing control in parenting scenarios without feeling like they’re setting a bad parenting example. You’ll also understand why having the ability to press the “pause button” is a superpower that works wonders to resolve conflicts with our kids and relationships.

A Wide-Ranging Conversation Through…

The importance of taking a timeout
Yelling at your kids again? Most parents do
Even parenting experts lose their cool
Getting your kids to LISTEN to you
Do you feel calmer after screaming at the kids?
Human superpower: The ability to pause
Dealing with choices, time limits and consequences
Why silence is another form of screaming
The balancing act of overprotection vs life lessons
A raising kids mentality leads to having adult kids
Holding space for our inner child

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