Modern Wisdom #983 - Gay Hendricks - Deeply Connected Relationships
958 snips
Aug 21, 2025 Gay Hendricks, a renowned psychologist and author, dives deep into the essence of conscious loving in relationships. He explains crucial distinctions between conscious and unconscious loving, emphasizing emotional honesty and personal responsibility. Listeners learn about the power of vulnerability and the importance of navigating uncomfortable truths. Hendricks also discusses the significance of co-commitment and proactive benevolence, urging couples to move beyond the often imbalanced 'keeping score' mentality for stronger, more fulfilling partnerships.
AI Snips
Chapters
Books
Transcript
Episode notes
Relating, Not Trends, Shapes Relationships
- Your relationship experience is determined by how you show up, not macro trends or evolution.
- Small daily relating mechanisms (state, communication, expectations) mediate every relationship.
Name Your Feelings First
- Learn to feel your feelings by naming them when asked and develop an inner vocabulary (angry, sad, scared, attracted).
- Practice that inner move of checking in so you can answer honestly when your partner asks.
Make Truth-Telling Habitual
- Tell the truth about your feelings, even small ones, rather than hiding or performing a persona.
- Make honesty habitual so your partner can trust what you say.
