The Art of Manliness

#548: How to Start and Sustain Conversations

Oct 2, 2019

In this engaging discussion, Don Gabor, an author with decades of experience in teaching communication skills, shares insights on how to initiate and maintain conversations. He tackles common hurdles people face, such as social anxiety and the fear of rejection. Don reveals the SOFTEN method for improving approachability through positive body language. Listeners will learn effective icebreaker techniques, strategies for remembering names, and how to gracefully end conversations, all aimed at making meaningful connections.

53:52

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Episode guests

Don Gabor

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Quick takeaways

Social skills expert Don Gabor emphasizes the importance of making small talk and socializing to build connections with people.

Don Gabor advises using open postures, maintaining eye contact, and providing a friendly smile to make oneself more approachable.

When starting a conversation, focus on shared surroundings or interests and use keywords from the conversation to transition to new topics.

Deep dives

Importance of Changing Dim Headlights

Dim headlights can lose up to 50 feet of visibility, making it crucial to replace them before they burn out.

Conversation Starter: Shared Context

04:22

Tips for Making Yourself More Approachable

03:44

Starting Conversations at Events

03:37

The Importance of Goals in Conversations

04:35

Intro

2min

Mastering the Art of Conversation

11min

Mastering Approachability: The SOFTEN Method

6min

Mastering Conversation Skills

8min

Conversations That Connect

7min

Mastering Conversations: Name Recall and Engagement

22min

Enhancing Social Skills Through Conversation

3min

Whether sitting next to someone on the subway, mingling at a wedding, or chatting around the water cooler, chances to make conversation and new friends abound in our lives. But how do you meet and talk to people without being awkward about it?

My guest today has spent over three decades teaching people from all walks of life how to make small talk and socialize. His name is Don Gabor, and he's the author of several books, including the one we're talking about today, How to Start a Conversation and Make Friends.

We begin our conversation discussing where Don sees people have the most problems with starting and sustaining conversations, as well as whether these issues have or haven't changed over the last thirty years. Don then walks us through how you can make yourself more approachable for small talk, why body language is so key in this area, and the best way to give a handshake. We then discuss how to break the ice with someone you've just made contact with, how to handle rejection, and how to remember people's names after you meet them. Don then shares how to keep the conversation going by offering up and homing in on certain keywords. We end our conversation, with how to end a conversation.

Get the show notes at aom.is/conversation.

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The Art of Manliness

#548: How to Start and Sustain Conversations

Episode guests

Podcast summary created with Snipd AI

Quick takeaways

Deep dives

Importance of Changing Dim Headlights

Connecting with Others through Small Talk

Overcoming Communication Challenges

Creating Approachable Body Language

Breaking the Ice and Keeping Conversations Going

Conversation Starter: Shared Context

Tips for Making Yourself More Approachable

Starting Conversations at Events

The Importance of Goals in Conversations

Remember Everything You Learn from Podcasts