Learn how to handle persistent questioning by young children, advice on ignoring repetitive behaviors, strategies to avoid giving the behavior power and teach children about boundaries and consideration for others.
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Quick takeaways
Parents should resist the urge to repeat themselves when a child repeatedly asks the same question, and instead acknowledge that the child heard the answer.
Parents can choose not to get caught up in repetitive behaviors by responding confidently and playfully, without giving unnecessary attention to the behavior.
Deep dives
Handling Repeated Asking
When a child repeatedly asks a question even after receiving a 'no' answer, it is important for parents not to get hooked by responding or feeling frustrated. Instead, parents should acknowledge that the child heard the answer and resist the urge to repeat themselves. By not engaging with the repeated asking, parents can help bring an end to the behavior without actively ignoring the child.
Areas of Weakness and Repetitive Behavior
Children may also repetitively ask for things or ask 'why' as a way of testing boundaries and sensing areas of weakness in parents. Whether it's the desire for more books, seeking explanations, or engaging in special games, parents can recognize when these repetitive behaviors become a test and choose not to get caught up in them. Responding with confidence, offering a nod or a playful response, parents can let go of worries about the child feeling ignored while not giving the behavior unnecessary attention.
Teaching Boundaries and Resisting Frustration
Not allowing repetitive behavior to evoke frustration or annoyance from parents is essential in teaching children about healthy boundaries and respectful relationships. Parents can rise above these behaviors by remembering their role as the adult and recognizing that children's repetitive behavior is a normal part of learning and exploring. By not allowing themselves to get hooked in, parents can maintain positive power and model the importance of not seeking to annoy or frustrate others.
It’s common for children – toddlers especially – to ask the same question again and again. The behavior can be exhausting and annoying. Perhaps they won’t take “no” for an answer, or they innocently ask, “Why, why, why?” when you’ve answered their question repeatedly. Janet discusses the causes and possible remedies. For more on common parenting issues, please check out this new audio resource -- "Sessions" -- my recorded consultations with parents: SessionsAudio.com