On Attachment #207: Why You Feel Secure When You’re Single (But Anxious When You Start Dating)
Sep 23, 2025
Ever wondered why you feel secure when single but anxious when dating? The podcast explores how attachment styles lay dormant until relationships trigger them. It discusses the vulnerability that comes with caring for someone and offers reassurance that feeling anxious is a normal part of the process. Tips on how to recognize and respond to this anxiety without judgment provide valuable insights. Healing attachment patterns can happen, but only in the context of relationships, making this a compelling listen for anyone navigating love.
AI Snips
Chapters
Transcript
Episode notes
Calm Single Life Can Mask Attachment Fears
- Feeling secure while single then anxious when dating is common for anxious attachment.
- Your calm while solo often reflects lack of relational triggers, not permanent security.
Identify Fears And Protective Strategies
- Learn what you fear in relationships and how you respond to that fear to understand your attachment style.
- Identify protective strategies like clinging or distancing so you can target them intentionally.
Attachment Patterns Are Situation‑Triggered
- Attachment patterns are activated by relational stress and lie dormant when you're single.
- Those patterns exist because they evolved to manage fears like rejection and being smothered in relationships.