Professor of Psychology Thomas Curran discusses the harmful effects of perfectionism and how to break free from societal pressures. They explore the rise of perfectionism in younger generations, the balance between high standards and self-acceptance, and the importance of embracing imperfections in personal and professional growth.
Perfectionism arises from deep-seated insecurities and a constant need for external validation.
Balancing perfectionism with a focus on sustainable growth promotes continuous improvement and self-acceptance.
Deep dives
Identifying the Cost of Perfectionism
Success in the pursuit of perfection often leads to a lack of personal life experiences due to the extraordinary effort required. Moving frequently without forming deep connections can result in burnout. The speaker, a psychology professor, discusses uncovering the detrimental impact of perfectionism and its implications on self-identity and relationships.
Roots of Perfectionism and Self-Worth
Perfectionism stems from a sense of inadequacy and an overwhelming need to conceal perceived shortcomings. It manifests as an overemphasis on high standards but is rooted in insecurity and anxious energy. Self-worth becomes contingent on external validation, leading to behaviors like people-pleasing and constant reassurance seeking.
Perfectionism, Procrastination, and Self-Sabotage
Perfectionists exhibit tendencies of working excessively hard yet struggling to convert effort into tangible performance outcomes. The interplay between perfectionism and procrastination arises from a fear of failure and a need to avoid public setbacks. The self-sabotaging behaviors of perfectionists hinder progress and mask underlying insecurities.
Shifting Towards Purpose and Acceptance
Balancing perfectionistic tendencies with practices like diligence and meticulousness signifies a healthy approach to work. Redirecting focus towards vocation and purpose, rather than constant growth, allows for sustainable personal and professional growth. Embracing imperfection and learning from mistakes fosters a mindset of continuous improvement and self-acceptance.
Thomas Curran is a Professor of Psychology at the London School of Economics. His first book, The Perfection Trap: Embracing the Power of Good Enough, charts the recent rise in perfectionism among young people, exposes the paradoxical effects of perfectionism on everything from work performance to relationships and argues for a “good enough” approach to work that prioritizes sustainability over growth.
On this episode of Everyday Better, Thomas joins Leah to talk about where perfectionism comes from, why it’s so harmful and how to break free from the internal and external pressures we feel to be perfect. They also take a critical look at the “growth mindset” and reflect on their own journeys towards overcoming perfectionism in their professional and personal lives.