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Episode 297: The Myth of Good Christian Parenting

Sep 25, 2025

Guest

Kelsey Kramer McGinnis

Guest

Marissa Burt

Marissa Burt and Kelsey Kramer McGinnis, authors of The Myth of Good Christian Parenting, shed light on the troubling history of Christian parenting advice. They discuss how the industry, rooted in figures like James Dobson, promotes harmful practices like spanking as a disciplinary norm. The duo critiques the hazardous language surrounding parenting and the implications of authoritarian teachings on child development. They also explore healthier, research-backed discipline methods and the cultural consequences of conventional Christian parenting beliefs.

01:34:12

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insights

INSIGHT

How The Christian Parenting Industry Began

Christian parenting emerged as a profitable market promising spiritual and social safety through authoritative methods.
Cultural fear, inerrancy, and media platforms amplified self-credentialed experts who discouraged outside evidence.

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INSIGHT

Authority Over Child Development

Christian parenting often centers parental authority and instant obedience as spiritual goals rather than child development.
This authority-first model reframes parenting as producing compliant disciples, not autonomous adults.

question_answer

ANECDOTE

Spanking To Train A Greeting

Nancy Wilson recounts spanking her preschooler to train her to greet her upon pickup.
She described giving a review and expecting an immediate, joyful greeting afterward.

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Origins of the Book Project

02:17 • 5min

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How the Christian Parenting Industry Began

06:51 • 10min

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Parental Authority and Instant Obedience

16:41 • 3min

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Spanking as the Default Tool

19:50 • 16min

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What Is Childhood?: Theologies and Assumptions

36:03 • 10min

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Viper in a Diaper: Dehumanizing Language About Kids

45:50 • 6min

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Detachment, Attachment Styles, and Parenting Trauma

51:27 • 9min

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Spiritualizing Punishment and Misreading Scripture

01:00:46 • 5min

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Liturgized Spanking and Its Long-Term Effects

01:05:54 • 12min

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Alternatives to Hitting: Discipline That Builds Character

01:17:41 • 3min

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Broader Cultural and Political Consequences

01:20:44 • 2min

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Response to James Dobson's Death

01:22:48 • 5min

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Book Release and Resources

Child Training for the 21st Century

Michael Pearl

Debi Pearl

First published in 1994, 'To Train Up a Child' by Michael and Debi Pearl is a highly controversial book that outlines the authors' approach to child training. The book has been criticized for its advocacy of corporal punishment, including the use of switches and other physical disciplinary methods. The authors argue that their methods are based on biblical principles, but many critics have condemned the book for promoting harmful and abusive practices. The book has been linked to several cases of child abuse and has been widely criticized by child welfare experts and organizations.

#1364

• Mentioned in 21 episodes

The Marriage You Want

• Mentioned in 3 episodes

The Altruistic Personality

Rescuers of Jews in Nazi Europe

Pearl M. Oliner

Samuel P. Oliner

This book delves into the profound acts of altruism during the Holocaust by examining the lives of over 700 European rescuers and non-rescuers. It provides insights into what drives people to act with extraordinary compassion and offers a roadmap for fostering altruism to prevent future atrocities. The authors aim to understand and promote the traits of altruism through their research.

#8053

• Mentioned in 4 episodes

Shepherding a Child's Heart

Tedd Tripp

Shepherding a Child's Heart is a comprehensive guide for parents, divided into two main parts: 'The Foundations for Biblical Childrearing' and 'Shepherding Through the Stages of Childhood. ' The book emphasizes the need to focus on the heart of the child, rather than just their outward behavior, and provides practical advice on communication, discipline, and parental authority. It also addresses various stages of childhood, from infancy to teenagers, and offers insights gained from Tripp's extensive experience as a pastor, counselor, and father. The book is known for its biblical approach and its ability to make theoretical principles practical for everyday parenting.

#18941

• Mentioned in 2 episodes

The cross and the switchblade

D. Wilkerson

This book chronicles the spiritual journey of David Wilkerson, a young evangelical pastor, as he embarks on a mission to help members of troubled street gangs in New York City in the late 1950s and early 1960s. The narrative follows his growth from personal, one-on-one encounters to a thriving community outreach program, highlighting the power of Christian faith and the potential for change in even the most hardened hearts. Wilkerson's story includes his founding of the Teen Challenge program and his encounters with gang members, such as Nicky Cruz, who later became an evangelist himself.

#6498

• Mentioned in 5 episodes

The Crucifixion

Understanding the Death of Jesus Christ

Fleming Rutledge

Fleming Rutledge's "The Crucifixion" offers a profound and insightful exploration of the death of Jesus Christ. It delves into the theological and historical significance of the crucifixion, examining its multifaceted dimensions. Rutledge's work challenges conventional interpretations, offering a fresh perspective on the event's meaning and impact. The book is characterized by its depth of theological reflection and its accessibility to a wide audience. It remains a significant contribution to understanding the central event of Christian faith.

• Mentioned in 2 episodes

The Excellent Wife

Martha Peace

#129

• Mentioned in 112 episodes

Good Inside

A Guide to Becoming the Parent You Want to Be

Becky Kennedy

In 'Good Inside,' Dr. Becky Kennedy shares her parenting philosophy, which focuses on building strong relationships with children rather than merely shaping their behavior. The book critiques traditional parenting methods like reward charts and time-outs, which fail to address children's complex emotional needs. Dr. Kennedy provides actionable strategies and troubleshooting for various parenting challenges, such as sibling rivalry, separation anxiety, and tantrums. Her approach helps parents move from uncertainty and self-blame to confidence and sturdy leadership, emphasizing the importance of compassion and understanding in parenting.

#41410

The Myth of Good Christian Parenting

How False Promises Betrayed a Generation of Evangelical Families

Kelsey Kramer McGinnis

Marissa Burt

#7845

• Mentioned in 5 episodes

Lost in Ideology

Interpreting Modern Political Life

Jason Blakely

Jason Blakely's 'Lost in Ideology' offers a fresh perspective on modern political life by examining the major ideologies that shape our world. The book argues that ideologies are both orienting and disorienting, and it provides a nuanced exploration of how these ideologies interact and influence society. Blakely covers a range of ideologies, including liberalism, conservatism, socialism, and more, highlighting their complexities and contradictions.

#6777

• Mentioned in 5 episodes

Better Ways to Read the Bible

transforming a weapon of harm into a tool of healing

• Mentioned in 10 episodes

Dare to discipline

James Dobson

The Day God Became King

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N. T. Wright

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It's The Great Sex Rescue--but for parenting!

The Christian parenting industry has been feeding us garbage for decades, and Keith and I sat down with Marissa Burt and Kelsey Kramer McGinnis, authors of "The Myth of Good Christian Parenting," to talk about how we got here.

THE MYTH OF GOOD CHRISTIAN PARENTING

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LINKS MENTIONED:

Instagram: @mburtwrites | @kelseykmcginnis
Threads: @mburtwrites | @kelseykmcginnis
Facebook: @mburtwrites | @kelsey.kramermcginnis
Bluesky: @mburtwrites | @kkramermcginnis
TikTok: @mburtwrites | @kelseykmcg
Substack: @mburtwrites | @kelseykramermcginnis
YouTube: @mburtwrites
Website: Marissa
My article on spanking and sexual arousal
My article on the research on spanking effects
The article about those who hid Jews during the Holocaust

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