Theology in the Raw A Raw Testimony from a Male Survivor
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Oct 16, 2025 Dr. Joel Willitts, a Professor at North Park University, shares his powerful story of surviving childhood sexual abuse. He discusses the lack of adequate care for survivors in churches and the complexities of grooming and consent. Joel emphasizes the importance of individualized healing over programmatic approaches, critiquing traditional accountability methods. He seeks to empower male survivors through his memoir, offering hope and emphasizing God's goodness even in darkness. This candid conversation sheds light on the profound journey of healing and understanding.
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Surviving A Hidden Childhood Abuse
- Joel recounts being sexually abused by his stepbrother from age 13 to about 16 and writing a raw, memoir-like book about it.
- He says the aftermath often proved worse than the abuse and that he describes the first encounter in detail to break abstractions.
Honesty Breaks Euphemism And Builds Empathy
- Joel emphasizes the need to move beyond euphemisms when talking about sexual abuse to create real empathy for survivors.
- He argues explicit, honest description can help listeners grasp the embodied reality survivors carry.
Grooming Created Conflicting Attractions
- Joel describes grooming: he felt captivated and at times attracted to his abuser despite not being same-sex attracted overall.
- He lived parallel lives—one public with girls and one private with his abuser—creating deep confusion.
