Where Should We Begin? with Esther Perel Couples Under Lockdown: Bavaria, Germany
Apr 2, 2020
A couple in Bavaria discusses their tumultuous relationship shaped by a year of living apart and the pandemic. They reflect on feelings of isolation and resentment, seeking to rekindle their connection. Esther Perel encourages them to focus on the love that remains rather than what was lost. They delve into the complexities of commitment, communication, and the importance of shared activities like cooking to enhance intimacy. Open dialogue becomes crucial as they navigate their emotional disconnect and adapt to new priorities amidst lockdown challenges.
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Couple's Disrupted Equilibrium
- A couple met in Germany, lived in Italy, and their equilibrium got disrupted when the wife took a job back in Germany.
- The husband stayed behind, promising to follow, but didn't, leading to fights and questioning the marriage's foundation.
Resentment and Hurt
- The couple is stuck in resentment, each feeling let down by the other.
- Focusing on the hurt they caused each other, rather than entitlement, may help them reconnect.
Focus on Feelings, Not Facts
- When arguing, focus on feelings rather than facts, cities, or jobs.
- Bickering and comparing sacrifices dries up the well of love.