Challenging traditional views on lust in the church, the podcast explores the difference between attraction and lust. They discuss a controversial story and creepy anecdote and promote the importance of viewing people as whole individuals. They also talk about pleasuring your wife, addressing PMS, and the reality of PMS.
41:59
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Quick takeaways
Lust should be differentiated from attraction, emphasizing the dignity and worth of women.
Prioritizing a partner's pleasure and avoiding missed opportunities enhances the sexual experience for both partners.
Deep dives
Understanding and Redefining Lust
Lust is often misunderstood and has been approached in a hurtful way by the Evangelical Church. The traditional view that all men struggle with lust can lead to guilt and shame. It is important to differentiate between attraction and lust. Attraction is a natural biological response, whereas lust involves deliberate objectification and disrespectful thoughts towards someone. Rather than focus on purity, it is more beneficial to consider the dignity and worth of women, treating them as whole people and image bearers of God.
The Role of Self-Stimulation and Pleasure in Intimacy
Engaging in self-stimulation during foreplay or intercourse is not sinful or wrong. It can add to the overall pleasure and enjoyment of the experience. However, it is essential for men to prioritize their partner's pleasure and ensure that she reaches climax before or at the same time as him. It reflects being a considerate and attentive lover. If a woman feels the need to pleasure herself after her partner finishes, it may indicate a missed opportunity for him to focus on her satisfaction and should be addressed to enhance the sexual experience for both partners.
Understanding and Supporting PMS
Premenstrual syndrome (PMS) is a real and common experience for many women. Hormonal changes during this time can make emotions more volatile and lead to increased irritability or sensitivity. It is crucial for husbands to acknowledge and support their wives during PMS instead of dismissing it or making fun of it. PMS is not a choice or an excuse but a biological reality. Showing empathy, patience, and understanding can go a long way in maintaining a healthy relationship during these hormonal fluctuations.
Appreciating the Great Guys and Encouraging Gentlemanly Behavior
There are many great guys out there who strive to be considerate, empathetic, and supportive partners. Their active efforts to avoid harmful stereotypes and teachings regarding lust or PMS are commendable. By seeking a Jesus-centered approach to marriage, focusing on mutual respect, pleasure, and a deep understanding of each other's needs, these great guys contribute to healthy and fulfilling relationships. They act as true gentlemen, honoring their wives and cultivating love and intimacy in their marriages.