May Christ Lift Thee

by Autumn Dickson

I had an experience right before I went on my mission. An article had come out about Texas making abortion more legal and accessible. I want to be very clear here in the beginning that this post is not about abortion itself. This is the story I’m choosing to tell in order to teach my principle, but the principle isn’t actually regarding abortion.

Anyway, the article that I read actually went into detail about abortion. It outlined different ways in which babies are aborted. In fact, it actually went into graphic detail about how some abortions are performed. There was one method in particular that was especially brutal, and it included pictures and diagrams.

There is a lot of scientific debate regarding when fetuses develop the ability to feel pain. Regardless, this article haunted me for quite some time. I couldn’t stop thinking about it whenever I had a moment to myself.

I remember seeing those pictures and diagrams every time I closed my eyes. I remember thinking about how confused and hurt these tiny babies must have felt when their warm little world was suddenly interrupted. I remember wondering if a spirit was already inhabiting the body and whether they went straight back to Heavenly Father, disappointed that their opportunity had been cut short.

I know abortion is a messy subject. I know that there are girls out there who had to make decisions alone, and those decisions were based on fear. I know that there is a lot of pain surrounding the topic, and I don’t want to further inflict pain.

But I share this experience because I feel like it highlights a true principle.

As this article stuck to me, I remember I couldn’t sleep very well. I just kept seeing all those babies. I remember I finally got out of bed and knelt down to pray about it. I hadn’t prayed about it before because I figured there wasn’t anything Heavenly Father could do. He had allowed for agency. Abortion was likely to stick around until Christ came again. I figured the only way I was going to find comfort again was when the issue finally stopped, and that wouldn’t be for some time.

But it got to the point where I wasn’t coping or sleeping so I prayed about it. It shocked me the comfort that was immediately granted to me. I had a picture of Christ welcoming those spirits back. Their pain was comparatively short lived, and Christ wouldn’t allow them to truly miss out on any opportunities. I remember them feeling comforted and being healed. This was probably one of my first experiences with Christ’s atonement where it was specifically utilized to make up for tragedy that couldn’t be explained on earth. I could feel that those spirits were okay.

As I’ve grown older, I’ve also come to appreciate His ability to heal the mothers. He can heal any pain that we have caused to others, and that can bring immense relief.

This is the experience that I thought of when I read Mormon’s words to his son.

Moroni 9:25 My son, be faithful in Christ; and may not the things which I have written grieve thee, to weigh thee down unto death; but may Christ lift thee up, and may his sufferings and death, and the showing his body unto our fathers, and his mercy and long-suffering, and the hope of his glory and of eternal life, rest in your mind forever.

There is so much tragedy in the world. I am so grateful that I’ve had experiences with Christ’s atonement that have left me feeling hope. I am so grateful for the experiences I’ve had of Christ that taught me innocents are ultimately healed and blessed beyond measure.

For those we love

Christ’s atonement applies to the innocent, but it also applies to those we love.

I had a good friend whose father went off the deep end. After living a “normal” life, he quickly turned to vices that led to his death. He abandoned his family, got into drugs, racked up immense amounts of debt in the form of money and pain, and then he ended his own life.

My friend loved his father and was trying to serve a mission despite the fact that all of this had happened within the previous year. I applaud him for trying. I also applaud the fact that he had wise leaders who sent him home to heal from the overwhelming tragedy.

As he was attempting to serve, he started asking questions about where his father was. Despite the pain that had been caused by his father towards the end of his father’s life, my friend had mostly grown up with a stable home life. He loved his father. He had many good associations with his father. He didn’t want his father to suffer. He didn’t want to serve and testify of the eternal nature of families when he was so deeply hurting over the pain within his own family.

I don’t know where his father is. I can’t testify that the atonement has saved him because I don’t know if he accepted it. I have hope. Though I don’t condone or encourage suicide, suicide can be an indication of remorse which is a step towards the atonement. I hope that remorse stayed and propelled him in the right direction.

That likely would not have been comforting to my friend who just wanted to hear that his father was being taken care of.

Luckily, I can testify of this. Every choice the Lord is making in regards to my friend’s father is the wisest form of care. Sometimes we want to just take away all the pain and make it go away, but this is not always the best care we can provide. The Lord knows that, and He provides what is truly needed.

That’s the power of the atonement. Every single portion of it is merciful and just. The part where Christ withholds the power of His atonement from those who refuse to repent is easily seen as just, but it is also merciful. It is an attempt to bring that soul back because if that soul doesn’t repent, then they will continue harming others and themselves. The pain continues. There would be no reason to even apply Christ’s atonement because the harm would continue on without changing. Why even put on a bandaid if you’re just going to take a knife to it again anyway?

I often picture the experience in the spirit world being akin to the story from “A Christmas Carol.” The spirits who chose wrong on earth find themselves in a “prison” of sorts, but I don’t picture an actual, physical jail. I picture these spirits becoming vastly aware of their choices in their previous life. They can see us more than we can see them. They are forced to acknowledge the pain they caused without being able to fix it since they have already passed on. This definitely feels like a prison; it can feel so painful; it is a life without the atonement. But it can also provide the bridge towards true healing. Scrooge was offered an opportunity to go fix his life. The spirits who have moved on from this stage of existence can’t go back and fix things, but they can embrace Christ’s atonement, and it can free them in the same way. Which leads me to my last point.

For the guilty

The atonement of Jesus Christ is surely good news to the innocent. It is good news to those who have loved ones who have chosen wrong. Eternal life will be made truly available to all, including those who were born into circumstances where they never even really had a chance to rise above. It is available to those who wouldn’t even know how to accept it in this life. This is all extremely comforting.

The atonement can also bring a lot of peace to the guilty, and I’m not just talking about the fact that you had your sins paid for. I’m talking about the aspect that Christ heals others from the pains you brought.

The repentance process can be uncomfortable for many reasons. One of the reasons is that you recognize the harm you caused others. In many cases, it may feel better to continue on in your path rather than turn around and acknowledge that you may have caused irreparable pain. However, if we can accept Christ’s atonement and if we allow that painful recognition to change our future choices, we find freedom from the knowledge that we hurt others.

And this is the true difference between those who inhabit spirit paradise or prison.

Everyone who comes to earth hurts others. We have all caused pain. I was literally thinking about some of my worst moments last night when I was trying to go to bed. We all wince when we remember times that we really hurt someone.

The difference between those who find paradise and those who find prison (in this life or the next life) is a knowledge of the atonement of Jesus Christ. I have often found myself cringing when I think of how I’ve hurt others throughout my life. The only thing that has ever brought me relief (i.e. paradise) is my trust that the atonement can heal those I’ve hurt. Because I’ve felt Him heal me, I know He can heal others. It doesn’t have to kill me forever. He can fix the mistakes I made and bring relief and happiness to everyone. We can all be okay again.

I’m grateful for the atonement of Jesus Christ. In so many ways, I know that I’m oblivious to the true depths of the atonement because I know that I have not suffered as some have suffered. But I have had experiences with His atonement, and I do know that it’s real. Those experiences are real enough that I have cause to believe that they extend even deeper and further than I understand. Christ heals. He heals the innocent. He heals those we love. He heals the guilty. The hope of His glory and eternal life can rest in our minds and free us from spiritual prisons.

 

 

Autumn Dickson was born and raised in a small town in Texas. She served a mission in the Indianapolis Indiana mission. She studied elementary education but has found a particular passion in teaching the gospel. Her desire for her content is to inspire people to feel confident, peaceful, and joyful about their relationship with Jesus Christ and to allow that relationship to touch every aspect of their lives. Autumn was the recipient of FAIR’s 2024 John Taylor Defender of the Faith Award.

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