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81. How to Finally Change Your Behavior (So it Sticks)

Jan 3, 2020

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In honor of the new year, today’s episode is about how to make behavioral change that sticks. Welcome to 2020 everyone! 2019 was an amazing year here at The Brainy Business, with 52 episodes released, more than 100,000 downloads in 150 countries, a brand new column on Inc.com (which already has 27 articles posted), a white paper on savings behaviors, two courses launched, and lots of engagement with all of you on social media.

Next week, I’ll dig into all of my top content from 2019. Today, is all about behavior change and narrowing your focus, so you can accomplish what matters most. If you are trying to do too many things at once, you will stay stuck. And, your brain actually wants that. I also talk about the Moment In Time or the Fresh Start Effect (like beginning your new goal or exercise program at the beginning of the year). I also talk about Temptation Bundling, which is combining something you should do (but often neglect) with something you really want to do) to help motivate you. This episode will help you name and claim your goal whether you are using fresh starts or temptation bundling (or ideally both!) to get going.

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Show Notes:

[06:45] The first thing to do, and something I have been preaching to you for months, is to narrow your focus.
[07:09] The brain can’t handle too many priorities. If you are trying to do too many things at once, you will stay stuck.
[07:19] The human brain likes predictability, it builds your world based on what has happened in the past and it likes to know where its next reward is coming from.
[07:51] If you don’t take the time to prioritize what really matters, your brain can keep hiding and keeping you stuck.
[08:24] Would you rather look back 10 years from now and say, “I made a little bit of progress on a lot of things…but never really completed what I wanted to” or “I completed one thing at a time and built on each success”?
[09:23] Now that you understand the importance of limiting your priorities and goals to no more than three, we can talk about how you can set yourself up for the most success for actually achieving what you have set as your priorities.
[09:46] There are many ways to tackle goals, and I'm going to share two of my favorites in this episode.
[10:54] You can and should throw everything you can at your goals including the tactics of "moments in time" and "temptation bundling."
[11:15] The "moment in time" is also known as the first start effect. This is exactly what you get at the beginning of the year (or decade in this case).
[11:36] We humans are wired to look at new moments in time as a fresh start. This is a form of mental accounting. These time breaks allow you to look at yourself fresh.
[12:27] We also create a new and distinct version of ourselves along with these fresh starts.
[15:04] One thing that the fresh start does is it prompts you to stop and, essentially, look up.
[15:39] Fresh starts are the opportunity to stop and look around to reevaluate what you’ve been doing and decide if it's time for a change.
[16:11] Anything and every day can be a fresh start.
[19:00] Any moment is an opportunity to be better than you were the moment before – an opportunity to reinforce those three goals you are focused on.
[21:51] Having an opportunity to step out of the everyday work and realign your priorities and make sure that you are still on track is a benefit to every business and individual.
[22:33] This practice can help you to reinvigorate your dedication to your life and commitments, to see what is working and what needs to change. It keeps you tuned in with yourself and your goals.
[22:45] Schedule quarterly appointments with yourself.
[23:22] If you are someone who sells products or services that align with being better or positive change…you should know when people are most likely to be looking for you and your offerings.
[23:40] At your office, align talking about change at times when people are already aligned for change like a holiday or New Year.
[24:37] While milestone dates can be beneficial for forming new habits…they also are a key point where you might BREAK habits – for better or worse.
[25:14] You can control this. Awareness is key.
[26:11] I've talked about bundling tasks and habit stacking in the goals episode.
[26:39] Temptation bundling is another way to motivate yourself to have positive behavioral change. You can combine doing something you really want to do with something that you know you should do.
[27:19] The only time you get to do the reward is when you are doing the thing that you should do.
[29:33] Two thirds of people would prefer to have their possessions locked up to keep them on track. Committing your goal to someone else means you are much more likely to keep it.
[31:09] The thing for you to do is think about what you wish you could do – or something where you tend to get distracted from your goals…and combine it so you can ONLY do it when it is helping you achieve your goal.
[32:19] Combining the knowledge of these two methods: temptation bundling and fresh starts, are a great recipe for achieving those goals and resolutions in 2020 and throughout the whole new decade.

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