
Your Body Remembers Pleasure Ecstatic Belonging: Sacred Intimacy, Erotic Community & Life After Retirement with Caffyn Jesse
What happens when a lifelong teacher of intimacy finally steps off the pedestal — and into freedom?
In this return conversation, I welcome Caffyn Jesse back to the podcast two years after retiring from the Institute for the Study of Somatic Sex Education, the pioneering training program they co-founded.
Instead of slowing down, Caffyn’s life force has only expanded.
With fewer roles, fewer responsibilities, and more spacious mornings, their work has distilled into something even more potent: ecstatic belonging, peer intimacy, and community-based erotic healing.
Through their new platform EcstaticBelonging.com and the online Intimacy Educator training, Kain has curated decades of somatic sex education, trauma-aware touch, nervous system science, and sacred sexuality into a living, accessible body of work.
This episode explores what becomes possible when we move beyond hierarchy, beyond performance, and into authentic, peer-to-peer connection.
We talk about:
• Life after “retirement” — and why stepping down created more creativity
• From teacher/student to peer intimacy and co-creation
• Distilling 12+ years of teaching into the Intimacy Educator online course
• Erotic embodiment as belonging — to self, community, and Earth
• The window of tolerance & neural learning zone in sexual healing
• Why safety alone isn’t enough (we also need bravery)
• Reclaiming voice, choice, and authentic consent
• The “Outlaw’s Journey” — trusting your inner truth over cultural norms
• Creating conscious erotic community with friends and lovers
• Touch as neuroplastic re-patterning and trauma integration
• Office hours, accessibility, and making this work available to everyone
• Psychedelic-supported bodywork — potential, caution, and ethical boundaries
• Integration, power dynamics, and the pace of trust
This conversation feels like sitting with an elder by the fire — honest, grounded, and deeply human.
Not about technique.
Not about performance.
But about learning how to belong — in your body, in your truth, and with each other.
Explore Kain’s work
Ecstatic Belonging + free resources: https://ecstaticbelonging.com
Intimacy Educator training: https://intimacyeducator.com
More somatic sexual healing resources:
https://rahichun.com
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