How Do I Learn to Love Myself, Really?

22 snips

Nov 28, 2022

In an intimate conversation, Oakley Robbins, Mel Robbins' 17-year-old son, opens up about his struggles with self-hatred during middle school. He shares his transformative epiphany towards self-love and the daily commitment it requires. With humor and vulnerability, they explore the power of positive compliments, the importance of embracing one’s unique traits, and how navigating adolescence shapes self-acceptance. Listeners are invited into a heartfelt family discussion that not only uplifts but also encourages personal reflection on self-love.

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ANECDOTE

Early Self-Consciousness

Oakley, at 13, felt self-conscious about his colorful, ever-changing hair.
He also disliked his weight, experiencing negative self-talk and body image issues.

ANECDOTE

The Jeans Story

In seventh grade, Oakley was teased for his legs when he wore shorts for the first time after months of wearing jeans.
This incident led him to avoid shorts for the rest of the year due to fear of judgment.

INSIGHT

Deflecting Attention

Self-conscious individuals often deflect attention from themselves.
This can manifest as criticizing others to shift focus away from their insecurities.

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Whatever you're doing right now, stop and make time for this conversation.

Every single day, I get questions from listeners about self-love, self-hatred, and what it actually means to like yourself.

I understand why it’s confusing.

The topic of self-love is so broad, and there is very little actionable advice on how exactly you learn to like yourself, especially if you’ve spent your whole life being hard on yourself.

So don’t worry, I’ve decided to attack this topic of self-love in a completely unique, surprising, and tactical manner. This is also one of the most personal episodes I’ve released because I’m inviting you to join a conversation I’m having with our 17-year-old son, Oakley.

This is not a “podcast interview.” This is an intimate conversation between a mother and a son about the most important topic you could discuss: self-love.

When Oakley was in middle school, he hated himself, and as his mom, it was awful to see him so lonely and sad. In today’s conversation, he shares things with me about this time in his life that I never knew.

And more importantly, we unpack the moment he had an epiphany that changed everything.

You will absolutely relate to everything he shares and his reflections about it.

I’m so proud to share this conversation with you. You will be blown away because you’ll not only feel like you’re part of our family, but we’re also welcoming you into our hearts.

You will laugh out loud, even though your heart might break a little. And by the end of it, you’ll have not only wisdom, but also a couple of simple tools to help you learn how to like yourself a little more.

This conversation is a must-listen for EVERYONE in your life. And especially for young adults because when they hear these insights from someone their age, it’s way more compelling than getting advice from an adult.

I do want to be up front about one thing: Oakley is 17 and like most 17-year-olds, whether they do it in front of you or not, he has a case of the F’s, meaning he drops the F-word a fair number of times, and I made a decision to record it as is and allow him to speak freely.

And, I just can’t emphasize enough how much insight this is going to give you into your own relationship with yourself.

I hope you will make the time to spend a half hour with the two of us, because I know you will leave feeling seen, understood, and liking yourself a little better.

I cannot wait to hear what you learn.

Xo Mel

For complete show notes, go to melrobbins.com