TAM+ EP 101 Thinking in Gray: Transforming All-or-Nothing Mindsets in Addiction
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Jan 29, 2026
They tackle black-and-white thinking and how rigid, all-or-nothing minds hurt recovery and relationships. They explain why the brain defaults to extremes and how that limits choices. Practical steps for shifting toward nuanced, “gray” thinking are discussed. Mindfulness, language shifts, seeking clarification from others, and a downloadable worksheet are highlighted as tools for change.
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insights INSIGHT
Extreme Thinking Narrows Possibilities
Black-and-white thinking (dichotomous thinking) narrows perception and forces extremes that aren’t accurate.
Duane Osterlind warns it limits choices and strategic thinking, keeping people stuck.
insights INSIGHT
How Extremes Upset Emotions
Extreme thinking fuels emotional instability by amplifying negative self-labels and reactions.
Duane Osterlind explains that seeing only extremes prevents growth and heightens emotional responses.
insights INSIGHT
Brain Efficiency Drives Extremes
The brain prefers black-or-white shortcuts because they save energy and speed decisions.
Duane Osterlind links this efficiency to habitual responses, especially after trauma.
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Welcome to the Addicted Mind podcast! Have you ever caught yourself thinking, "I'm either a success or a complete failure"? This episode is for you.
In this episode, we dive deep into the pervasive issue of black-and-white thinking, also known as dichotomous thinking and its impact on addiction recovery. Join Duane Osterlind and Eric Osterlind as they explore how this rigid mindset can create emotional instability and hinder progress. Drawing on principles from Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), they discuss practical steps to move from extreme thinking to a more balanced, nuanced approach. You'll learn mindfulness techniques, how to challenge your thoughts, and the importance of embracing the gray areas in life. By the end of this episode, you'll have valuable tools to help you think more dialectically and support your journey to recovery. Plus, don't miss the downloadable worksheet in the show notes to further your practice!
Key Topics
Understanding black-and-white thinking and its impact on recovery
Introduction to Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT)
Practical steps to shift towards dialectical thinking
Importance of mindfulness and self-compassion
Challenging extreme thoughts and seeking clarification
The role of language in shaping our perceptions
Timestamps
[00:00:00] Introduction and overview of black-and-white thinking
[00:02:15] The impact of black-and-white thinking on recovery and relationships
[00:06:15] Why our brains default to black-and-white thinking
[00:08:40] How to become a gray thinker: Practical steps
[00:10:58] Seeking clarification and the role of community support
[00:12:42] Reframing negative thoughts and focusing on positives
[00:14:11] Call to action: Download the worksheet and join the community
The Addicted Mind Podcast